<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>What if we don't live forever? by Ninabluesky</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26834986">What if we don't live forever?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninabluesky/pseuds/Ninabluesky'>Ninabluesky</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supergirl (TV 2015)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - No Powers, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Family Drama, Grief/Mourning, Light Angst, Pregnant Kara Danvers, Slow Build, SuperCorp Big Bang 2020</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 00:27:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>36,718</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26834986</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninabluesky/pseuds/Ninabluesky</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The goal is not to live forever, it’s to accept Life &amp; Death as its. It’s to do something about our lives without fear, without regrets. Lena &amp; Kara don’t have an easy life and they are  far to realize that they are destined to create something wonderful together. Will they be able to treasure it? Or, will they be too broken to embrace the gift they got?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>66</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Supercorp Big Bang 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=SCBB2020+team">SCBB2020 team</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Have you ever wondered how long you are supposed to live? Have you ever wondered what your real purpose is in this life? We don't live forever; that's a fact no one can deny. But, it's also a fact that most of the time, we don't decide how to leave this world or, when...</p><p>"Miss. Luthor..."</p><p>"Where are the reports I requested, Jess?"</p><p>"In the blue file, at your right..."</p><p>Lena nods, she opens the file and digs into it. Her brain is more efficient than any computer because in a matter of minutes, she has already pictured in her mind all the spreadsheet that any other human have taken hours to create in Excel. Yes, Lena Luthor is an extraordinary human being. Maybe that's the reason why she's the youngest CEO in the entire world.</p><p>But, you should know that being the head of the family's empire was never her goal. Oh no, Lena had other plans in mind when she was doing her PhD at MIT. She wanted to be no more than a rat lab, working on her inventions, but, as Lena was planning to live her life in a lab, creating things; life itself, it had other plans for her.</p><p><em> 'Your brother is dead to me!' </em> Her mother, Lillian said. <em> 'He wants to marry that corny boy, Clark Kent? Then, from now on, I don't have a son...' </em> Lillian said with so much anger and sorrow because after all, Lex was her favorite, her golden boy who was destined to rule the world and be the head of the company. To Lillian's dismay, he chose another path when true love knocked on his door.</p><p>As with many love stories, it happened when you'd least expect it. One moment, he was Lex, the smug, arrogant, heartless heir to the Luthor legacy, and the next, he was just a boy, a boy who fell deeply in love with a farmer boy.</p><p>From the moment Clark came into the picture, Lena saw how much her brother changed. He became a complete stranger to the family. Someone with a heart, someone warm, someone who had nothing to do with the Luthor's way, so, he left... he accepted the exile imposed by Lillian when she made him choose between Clark and the family.</p><p>The entire family was sure that Lex wouldn't be able to walk away from the comfortable and luxurious life he had as a Luthor. But, they couldn't be more wrong.</p><p>Deprived of the Luthor's name, and, all the wealth that comes with such a tittle, Lex walked away 3 years ago without turning back.</p><p>Lena doesn't blame Lex for the choices he made 3 years ago. To be honest, she admired him because he had the guts to choose love, true love instead of a life filled with both luxury and responsibility. But, as he stepped back from the throne, someone had to step in. And, that someone was Lena Luthor.</p><p>So, that's how Lena found herself with no other choice than to accept the burden of being the only heir of the Luthor's family, even if she didn't want it.</p><p>Looking back in time, it feels as if it was yesterday when she became the head of the company. But, it will be already 2 years since Lionel Luthor passed away, leaving Lena as the one responsible for keeping the company afloat.</p><p>It was hard at first to be a CEO, well, it keeps being a tough job to do, but, the first months after the death of Lionel, her father, it was really hard, especially because Lena wasn't really in line with the philosophy of the company.</p><p>More than 50% of the business was linked with the manufacturing of weapons. And, Lena wasn't okay with that, at all. She didn't want to be remembered in this world as the biggest manufacturer of weapons. She didn't have a say on becoming the CEO of Luthor's Corp, but she had a say on how she would do this job. So, with a new CEO came a new philosophy for the company.</p><p>Luthor Corp would always be remembered as one of the biggest manufacturers of weapons in the world. But, Lena cut ties with that corporate image when she changed the name of the company to: L-Corp.</p><p>No one with stake in the company likes the change, especially Lillian Luthor. The old woman made sure to make the transition as hard as possible. But, Lena didn't give up, she worked hard, really hard to change the course of the company. So, against the wishes of Lillian and other members of the board, Lena shut down the business of weapons, to welcome a new era for the company when she created her brand of Health &amp; Care.</p><p>It was a risky move that paid off really fast. Right now, there's no hospital in this world which hasn't at least one medical device of L-Corp making. Lena's brain creates the most amazing medical devices that you could imagine, they are so amazing that even before the product's launch, it's already sold out. The high order intake, the tremendous income that Lena was generating, it shut down any doubt that Lillian and some members of the board could have about the future of the company.</p><p>And, it makes Lena happy to shut Lillian's mouth. But, as much as she enjoys proving to Lillian how great she's, deep down, Lena would have loved to make all this possible, with her brother at her side.</p><p>Watching Lex leave with nothing after reading the will of their father, it has been one of the most painful things that Lena has ever experienced. Especially because at that time, she knew that Lex needed the money. The Kent's farm wasn't doing well, and he wanted to help the people who took him in, as part of their family.</p><p>Lex wasn't perfect, but he was her big brother, her companion in surviving their complicated and toxic family. And when the pressure of being the perfect Luthor was too high, he always knew the right thing to say to ease Lena's stress.</p><p>In his own way, he cared for Lena, he still cares, Lena knows that, even if Lillian has made it almost impossible for them to keep in contact. But, they find their ways to reach each other. X'mas postcards, encrypted texts that just they could figure out... yeah, they always find a way to keep in touch.</p><p>They are not as close as they were before Clark, but deep down, they know that they count on each other whenever is needed. And, that's why...</p><p>"Miss Luthor..."</p><p>"Jess, I'll need to see too, the financial reports of the Unit in Tokyo..."</p><p>"Of course. but, Miss Luthor..."</p><p>"And, make sure to add the forecast for the next year too. My mother and the members of the board will definitely ask for it, during the next meeting..."</p><p>"Yes, but, Miss Luthor..."</p><p>Jess has something very important to say. But, each time she tries to speak out, Lena shut her down with another task. Lena is a very demanding boss, she's always talking and thinking about work, but...</p><p>"MISS LUTHOR! YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO ME!"</p><p>Lena stays speechless and stares with wide eyes at her assistant. Jess lost her composure, slamming her fists on the desk and raising her voice to her boss! She would have never done that, but, she has to, because...</p><p>"You've a personal call on line 1, Miss. Luthor..."</p><p>"Personal...? Jess, if it's my mother, you know I don't take her calls, and..."</p><p>"Miss. Luthor, it's not your mother..."</p><p>Lena frowns. Besides her mother, she has no idea who could be calling, to make Jess think, it's a 'personal matter'. Lena's reluctant to take the call, as if something inside her was telling her not to pick up the phone because it would change her life forever. But, Jess insisted. She really insisted, no matter how afraid she was to piss off her boss, Jess didn't leave Lena alone till she saw her picking up the phone to take the call.</p><p>"Hello...?"</p><p>Lena never takes call of people she doesn't know, and when Jess told her that the call was from one Miss. Danvers. The name didn't ring the bell at all. Nevertheless, she took the call by request of her assistant, completely ignoring that her entire world would turn upside down from this exact moment...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>People don't live forever. But, maybe sometimes, that's for the best...</p><p>"Mommy. Daddy is drunk again"</p><p>"Kara, you don't know what you are taking about"</p><p>"But, mommy..."</p><p>"JUST LEAVE YOUR FATHER ALONE, KARA!"</p><p>The little girl pouts angrily because she might be a child, but she's old enough to know that her old man is drunk... for the 4th time in a row this week, to be precise. And, Kara loves her father, she really does, but, she doesn't like him when he's like this because you never know how he will behave. He can just cry and drink till he falls asleep, or, he can become the monster that scares Kara the most. What will be today? Kara doesn't know till she hears him yell and throwing things towards them.</p><p><em> ‘It's gonna be okay because he doesn't aim to hurt us’ </em> , her mother always says. <em> ‘It's because he's depressed’ </em> , her mother always says. <em> ‘It's because no one hires him </em> ’, her mother always says. <em> ‘It's because they lost the house and have to live in a trailer now’ </em>, her mother always says and no matter what excuse Alura plans to say today, Kara has no intention to stay around and hear the lies.</p><p>Beer bottles start to crash against the walls and Kara knows she has to leave now before she faces the big monster once again. The little blonde grips hard on her teddy bear while she runs towards the door, trying to dodge the bottles and the broken glass, so worried about not getting hurt, that the poor girl doesn't put attention on the candle she drops by accident when she rushes towards the door of the trailer.</p><p>"FIRE!"</p><p>People from other trailers notice the fire, Kara also notices the fire when she stands there, in front of the trailer. She sees the flames, the smoke as well as the fact that her mother could get out, but decides not to...</p><p>"MOMMY! GET OUT!"</p><p>Looking her in the eyes, between the flames, Alura shakes her head and stays inside. Her mother is choosing to stay beside the monster and leave her alone. And, the little girl has no words, she just stops gripping on her stuffed toy, the teddy bear drops out of Kara's hands, just like her hopes in humanity.</p><p>Goodbyes are never easy, just as new beginnings...</p><p>"Kara. This is gonna be your new home..."</p><p>Mr. Danvers says when he welcomes the blonde to his home. It's a nice home, and, Kara should feel happy to finally get adopted by a good family, but she's not responding to the good news.</p><p>"She doesn't speak?"</p><p>Jeremiah shakes his head when his wife asks the question. Eliza ignores why the child has shut down from the world, why her beautiful blue eyes look so empty. It's nothing against the Danvers, it's just that Kara has lost everything, even her hope.</p><p>It's sad that at her young age, Kara expects nothing good from this world, maybe that's why Jeremiah stepped in, trying to change that as soon as she found her. He knew Kara's father. Working together in a military project for Luthor Corp, it changed their lives forever.</p><p>Jeremiah doesn't speak about what really happened back then, about why he found his exit from the project before it was too late; he'll always regret not being able to do more for Kara's father. And, that's the main reason why Kara is here today. Jeremiah couldn't help his friend when he needed the most, but, maybe he can do something for his child.</p><p>A new life, in a new town came with a new last name and a new sibling...</p><p>"Alex... I'm Alex Danvers..."</p><p>Kara nods when the teenager introduces herself. The brunette wasn't happy about the idea of sharing her room. At her age, she wants privacy and not the responsibility to look after a kid. And, that's why Alex makes no effort at all to give Kara a warm welcome to their home.</p><p>Yeah, Alex has no intention of being a big sister for Kara, but that changes when one day at school, Kara gets bullied by some kids because she doesn't speak. They start to throw her food during the lunch break and everyone finds it funny except for Alex.</p><p>It's not the first time that someone throws something at her, so Kara doesn't make a big deal about it. '<em> People are cruel' </em> , Kara thinks. ' <em> People are mean' </em> , Kara thinks. ' <em> People are monsters </em>', Kara thinks. And, maybe she's right, people can be monsters, but, they can also be heroes...</p><p>"Hey! Stop it!"</p><p>The big sister instinct finally kicks in Alex, and before knowing it, she's kicking the ass of so many kids. Everyone is shocked with what is happening. They didn't know Alex was a fighter, not even Alex. She didn't know she had it in her. But, as shocking as it was to realize that Alex could fight, it was a bigger shocker for Kara to realize that someone was fighting for her well-being.</p><p>Noses got broken, Alex got grounded. But, it was all worth it because Kara was finally getting back something she lost a long time ago: Hope.</p><p>Hope of a new beginning, Hope in humanity, Hope that everything will get better. Alex brought back Kara's hopes. And with it, the shy, quiet blonde blossomed into a sunshine and happy person...</p><p>"Alex! Happy Birthday!"</p><p>Kara sings HB to the grumpy brunette, like every year, and, like every year, Aex refuses to leave the bed at this early hour in the morning...</p><p>"C'mon, Alex, it's your birthday! We need to make the most of it!"</p><p>Kara tries to get Alex out from the bed, but Alex keeps a firm grip on the sheets, trying to stay between them, like a racoon.</p><p>"You know, I liked you more when you didn't speak"</p><p>"Hahaha, very funny!"</p><p>Kara opens the curtains and the sun comes in. The blonde smiles, embracing the warm touch of the sun. It's a beautiful day to celebrate one of her favorite people in the world. And, it was a wonderful day, or it had been  till Eliza asked their help to clean the garage.</p><p>"We have so much stuff. Where did all of this come from??"</p><p>"I keep telling you, Alex, you're a hoarder. If you keep being like this, no one will marry you!"</p><p>"Shut up!"</p><p>Alex playfully pushes Kara away and both sisters laugh, making jokes about all the useless stuff they find in their garage.</p><p>"Are you bringing this to college?"</p><p>Alex sighs when she sees the box with all her science trophies in it; she loves them, each one of them, it's a reminder of how amazing she's. A booster to her self-esteem, but she doesn't think she will have the space in the dorms, so she decides to label that box with the label 'to donate'.</p><p>"Hey! You can't donate them!"</p><p>"Kara, I'll not bring them with me to Metropolis. And, mom asked us to give away all the things we will not need anymore"</p><p>"Yeah, but..."</p><p>"It's okay, Kara, I don't need them"</p><p>Alex might feel she doesn't need them. But, Kara needs them to stay in their home. Her big sister is going far away, to college. And, she needs something to hold on while she's gone. Each one of the trophies is linked with a happy memory of Kara working with Alex, side by side. She has always assisted Alex in her science projects, and she's not ready to let go of those memories, so Kara takes the box to the attic to hide it. But she wasn’t the only one to try to hide secrets in the attic...</p><p>"Crap!"</p><p>Kara drops old boxes when she gets into the attic. She settles the box she was bringing in and kneels to clean the mess caused by her clumsiness. Bunch of papers, data from old projects of Jeremiah. Nothing revealing for Kara till an old picture catches her eyes.</p><p>"DAD?!"</p><p>Nothing gets hidden forever, and some secrets come out into the light, just to bring back old monsters back to our lives...</p><p>"Kara? What are you doing here? What a nice surprise!"</p><p>Jeremiah looks happy to see Kara on the lake where he was fishing. The girls don't like to fish, that's why he's surprised to see Kara here, but, when the blonde shows him an old picture he had in the attic, the reason for her presence becomes more clear now.</p><p>"Kara, please, let me explain..."</p><p>"Explain what, Jeremiah?! That you knew my father, that you knew about my family all this time and you never said anything to me?!"</p><p>The blonde snaps at the man who has been like a father to her for so many years now. She has never raised her voice to him, nor to Eliza, never! But, when she saw the picture of her biological father, side by side with Jeremiah, she felt betrayed, lied to, and scared of what this could mean...</p><p>"You knew my father"</p><p>"I did..."</p><p>"You know what happened to him. To my parents?"</p><p>"I know about the fire. About how you might think it's your fault, but it's not your fault Kara"</p><p>"You don't know that. You weren't there! You..."</p><p>"I wasn't there when your father needed a friend. When he needed a hand, I couldn't help, but, I'm here for you, I..."</p><p>"What do you mean with '<em> you weren't there for him </em>'?"</p><p>Jeremiah gulps hard, he knows something. Something he doesn't dare to say. He hopes Kara will understand he just wants to protect her, but, if there's something Kara doesn't tolerate, it's to be lied, even if it's for her own good.</p><p>Her mother always lied, pretending that everything was okay while her father became a drunk monster. Kara knows what lies do to people. So no, she will not be lied to again.</p><p>"Tell me the truth. You know something about my family. Something I ignore..."</p><p>"Yes"</p><p>"Tell me what you know"</p><p>"I can't Kara, I'm sorry. I can't..."</p><p>Kara deeply exhales. Rage overwhelmed her senses, causing her to say awful things like '<em> I hate you! </em> ', <em> 'I don't want to see you again!'. </em> Kara angrily yells awful things as she runs away, leaving him alone on the lake with a sad look on his face.</p><p>Kara said so many things that day, things she regrets now, because she never thought those things could ever be the last words she said to him.</p><p><em> 'It was a heart attack </em>'. That's what the medical reports indicate. The Danvers hear the same cause of death from all the doctors of the hospital. Over and over again, they say the same thing. But, just because they say it a thousand times, it doesn't make it feel more real.</p><p>"This can't be happening... not, on my birthday..."</p><p>Eliza holds Alex in a big hug, trying to give any kind of comfort to her kid. While Kara is just there, in silence. Looking at the emptiness of the room... of her heart.</p><p>It's very late when they come back home from the hospital. Still shocked about how the beautiful day became one of the worst days of their lives. And, Alex doesn't understand what happened, she doesn't get why her father suffered a heart attack while he was fishing, but, Kara has a hunch of what went wrong.</p><p>"Alex. There's something I need to tell you..."</p><p>Alone in their room, Kara tells Alex what happened earlier that day. She expects to feel better after it, but, she feels even worse, especially when Alex angrily slaps her in the face.</p><p>"Alex?!"</p><p>"You killed him!"</p><p>"Alex, no! I...."</p><p>"Killing your parents wasn't enough, isn't it? You had to kill my Dad, too?"</p><p>Kara stays speechless, tears fall from her blue eyes. Years ago, she told Alex about the fire where her parents died because she trusted her. Kara never thought that piece of information could be used against her like this. <em> 'Maybe people are really monsters after all' </em>it's what Kara thinks when she hears Alex poisoned words, filled with hate. It's a more painful thing than Kara has ever heard before...</p><p>"I'm sorry, Alex..."</p><p>"Get out!"</p><p>Kara doesn't move, she has no idea of what to do or what to say but...</p><p>"Get out! Leave! This is not your home anymore!"</p><p>But, Alex makes it very clear that she's no more welcome in the house, so, without flinching, Kara walks away. She leaves the house, she leaves the town, she leaves behind Kara Danvers, the sunshine girl she became, just to be faced with her biggest fear: loneliness.</p><p>Without a place to go, without a family to rely on. Kara has no idea of what she should do. She has nothing left, except to find the truth about her family. Jeremiah was hiding something, deep down, Kara knows it. And, trying to find that truth, it's the only that Kara has left. Or, at least that's what she believes.</p><p>After a few years of finding nothing, Kara finds something she wasn't expecting to find, something that brings her to a little town called Smallville...</p><p>"Hello. Are you lost?"</p><p>Kara opens her mouth, but no words come out. She knocked on the door, without having a plan for what to do next...</p><p>"This is the Kent farm. What brings you here?"</p><p>"Are you Clark Kent?"</p><p>"Yes. Why? How do you know my name?"</p><p>"Because I think... I... you're my cousin..."</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>Kara is as confused as Clark. She was sure she didn't have living relatives. But, when she started to investigate her past, about her family, she found that she wasn't the only adopted child in the family. Clark was put up for adoption, years before Kara was born, maybe that's why she didn't know about his existence till now.</p><p>Clark knows about his adoption, he knows his biological parents sent him away, hoping he would find a better life, and he found that better life when the Kents took him in. That's why he never felt the need to reach out to his biological family. He doesn't feel the need to know about his blood family. But when he looks at Kara. At the skinny girl who has probably not eaten in days, he doesn't have it in him, to turn his back on this girl who proclaims to be his family.</p><p>Clark opens his door for her and once again, Kara has hopes in humanity.</p><p>"Looking at how much you can eat. You're definitely Clark's family!"</p><p>"Hey! I don't eat that much!"</p><p>Everyone chuckles and Kara blushes a lot. The Kent have welcomed her with open arms. And, it was nice to be part of a family again. So, nice that Kara forgets about her research and the main reason she's here till one day...</p><p>"Your father worked for Luthor Corp?"</p><p>Kara nods when Lex looks at all the documents that Kara brought with her. He hears her out without judging her, with nothing more than empathy. And, Kara couldn't ask for more than that.</p><p>"I just want to understand why my Dad became the monster he was before he died"</p><p>There must be a reason to drink so much, to be so angry. Kara wants to believe that he was pushed to become that monster, and she wants to know why. She has lost so much already, finding the truth about it, it's the only thing that gives her a reason to keep going in life.</p><p>"I can help you. I'll help you!"</p><p>"Really?"</p><p>Lex nods and he has every intention to help Kara find the answers she was looking for, but like everything in life, you plan something, and finish doing something else. And that's what happened to Kara when she overheard Clark and Lex, talking about making a family together.</p><p>"Lex, we can't afford a kid now"</p><p>"I know, but we are getting old. And, time flies so fast. Before we know it, we're in our 80's with no one to visit us during Xmas"</p><p>Clark chuckles and shakes his head. He wants a kid too. Since Kara came to live in the farm, a protective instinct activated in him. A feeling he likes a lot and he would like to explore more but...</p><p>"Two men can't have a baby, Lex"</p><p>"According to whom?"</p><p>"Lex..."</p><p>"Someone can carry the baby for us"</p><p>"Who? Those kinds of things cost lots of money. And..."</p><p>"And, we don't live forever, Clark. We are here today, tomorrow, we don't know. So, let's make a family now. Let's bring a little joy to this family, now. A little hope to show us that everything will be okay"</p><p>Lex's words touch a soft spot in Kara's heart, and, maybe that's why she decides to do something about it. From all the things she has heard from Lex and his past, she’s sure that there’s one person who can make this possible. That’s how she decides to reach out to the only person who might be able to help them...</p><p>"Hello?"</p><p>Lena never takes call of people she doesn't know, and when Jess told her that the call was from one Miss. Danvers. The name didn't ring the bell at all. Nevertheless, she took the call by request of her assistant, completely ignoring that her entire world would turn upside down from this exact moment because, from all the things she was expecting to hear, she wasn't ready to hear what Kara was planning to say...</p><p>"Hi. I'm Kara Danvers. And, I need your help to make a baby"</p><p>"What?!"</p><p>People don't live forever. And, that's okay. That's a reminder to never forget that we need to make the most of it, in this life. For those we love and care. And, that's what Kara plans to do with the help of Lena.</p><p>Focusing on making Lex &amp; Clark's wish coming true, once again, Kara acts, ignores what her actions might engender.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If you see someone asking for help, do you help them? Or, do you look away? We always have a choice, even if most of the time we completely ignore the consequences of our choices...</p><p>"I can't believe I'm doing this. You know Lex, of all the crazy things I’ve heard you say, this is the craziest one!"</p><p>"C'mon, Lena. Do you really think I'll be such an awful parent?"</p><p>Lena chuckles, drinking her whiskey as she reads all the medical reports she got from the tests she did to Kara. Lena doesn't think that this version of Lex will be a bad parent, but, they are Luthors after all, so, her expectations for them, to be skilled parents are very low. Even then, she's willing to help her brother to expand his family.</p><p>"She's really something..."</p><p>Looking at the photo of the blonde, the one that's attached to the medical file, Lena can't figure out how this girl got her into this mess. But...</p><p>"Kara has a strong will. When she has something in mind, she goes for it, with everything she has."</p><p>And, it was true, she has a strong determination to go for it till the end. Maybe that's why she thought she would be a good reporter someday, but those dreams seem to be from another life because right now, her biggest dream is to give Clark &amp; Lex a ray of hope.</p><p>The Kents are getting old, the farm is not doing well. Everyone might believe this is the worst moment to bring a baby to the family. But contrary to what most of the people think, Lex really believes this is the best moment to add someone else to the family. They need a good thing, and that good thing, it's gonna be the baby that will be carried by...</p><p>"Kara Danvers"</p><p>"Yes? Is there something wrong with Kara?"</p><p>“No. She looks healthy, but I want to speak with her before doing any procedure. I want to make sure she completely understands about what she’s signing in.”</p><p>“You already spoke with her on the phone the other day. You know she’s the one who put this into motion. She’s the one who offered to be our surrogate mother and even talked with you about it without saying a word to me or Clark, so why are you questioning her decision now?”</p><p>“She’s very young, Lex. A very young, impressionable mind that…”</p><p>“That you think I manipulated to get something I want, right? Because after all, that’s what Luthors always do to get what they want, isn’t it?”</p><p>Lex looks upset. Lena can understand why he’s upset, after all, she feels the same each time that someone thinks the worst of her. But, she’s a Luthor, and Lex is a Luthor. And if there’s one thing you can be sure of, it’s that you cannot trust in Luthor Not at 100% and certainly not without doing your homework first. So…</p><p>“Lex, you want my help. You need my help. I’m the only person with the technology and the resources to help you. So, let me talk to Kara. Alone. And then, maybe I’ll do this for free”</p><p>“Free? Wow, how honored I am to be your next charity work”</p><p>Lena rolls her eyes, Lex is being sarcastic and difficult, but, can you blame him? After all, his own sister believes he’s forcing Kara to carry a baby against her will.</p><p>“I’ll ask Kara to meet you, alone. I don’t believe she will be against it”</p><p>“Great…”</p><p>“But Lena, I don’t want Mother to know about this”</p><p>Lena nods. She also has no intention to  let her mother know she’s helping Lex in bringing life into this world. After all, they know their mother well enough to know that she would make their lives a living hell, trying to stop them. </p><p>“I need to go into the office now, Lex. Ask Kara when it’s okay for her to meet. I believe that meeting here, at my penthouse, would be best. This is a safe place where no one will hear what we discuss”</p><p>Lex nods, he puts on his disguise so no one knows who he is and gets ready to leave as well as Lena, but, before leaving, he says that he has another favor to ask too. Lena frowns, she wonders if he’s finally asking her for money, but, to her surprise, all he wants it’s to look into old files of Luthor Corp.</p><p>“Why do you want to look into Luthor Corp?”</p><p>Lex doesn’t give her a real reason. To be honest, he’s not sure what he’s looking for, but he promised Kara to help her to find what happened to her father. Giving Kara some peace of mind on the subject, it’s the last thing he can do for the woman who’s willing to carry his child, that’s what Lex thinks. And, that’s what he plans to do while Lena and Kara meet alone at the penthouse…</p><p>“Please, come in”</p><p>Lena welcomes the shy blonde in. Some hours after her meeting with Lex, Kara steps into the luxurious place, it’s imposing, so, keeping her stare down, Kara finds her way to the white couch. She looks afraid. And, Lena wonders if it’s because of her.</p><p>“You know, you shouldn’t believe everything you read on the news about me. I mean, I’m not any witch who eats men just for fun”</p><p>Lena jokes while she serves herself a drink. But, the blonde makes no reaction to the joke at all, so Lena's smirk fades and the CEO puts on her business face. If Kara wants to be formal, she can do that.</p><p>“Can I offer you something to drink: Vodka, whiskey…?”</p><p>“I don’t drink. Thank you”</p><p>Lena nods, and sits besides the girl. They sit in silence for a brief moment that felt longer than what it really was. And, if there’s something Kara doesn’t have, it’s the patience to wait for things to happen, so, she goes straight to the point, getting Lena off guard when she starts talking…</p><p>“What is your problem?”</p><p>“Excuse me?!”</p><p>Kara sounds irritated, and now, Lena feels the same when Kara set the tone of this conversation.</p><p>“You have the opportunity to help your brother. To do something good for him. And you hesitate? Why? I thought Lena Luthor never hesitates.”</p><p>“I don’t hesitate. I just want to make sure that you know what you’re getting into.”</p><p>“I know what I’m doing…”</p><p>“You say that, but I’m not so sure…”</p><p>“And, what do I need to do to make you believe that I can do this?”</p><p>Was that a challenge? Lena smirks, she must admit that she’s surprised to realize that Kara has the guts to talk to her like this. The fear that Kara was showing when she first arrived at Lena’s home is no longer there. She looks strong, determined, ready to face anyone… even someone as terrifying as Lena Luthor.</p><p>But, as Kara is ready to face Lena without fear, she’s not ready to face the past as well…</p><p>“You’re a runaway, Miss Danvers. How do I know you’ll not run away with this baby too…?”</p><p>“What?! What do you mean?”</p><p>Lena walks away to bring a file she has about Kara. The blonde gulps hard when she sees the main chapters of her life, put together in a file…</p><p>“I’m sorry for the death of your parents. I can’t imagine what must feel like to lose them at such a young age”</p><p>Lena has no intention of bringing back painful memories for the blonde. But, she’s not sure if this girl is emotionally stable enough to commit to this. After all, any pregnancy comes with a hormonal roller coaster. And, looking at Kara’s life, the blonde doesn’t seem to be the best fit for the job, if you ask Lena.</p><p>“Why do you want this, Miss Danvers?”</p><p>“Do you believe I have a secret agenda? Really?”</p><p>“I’m a Luthor. I don’t ‘believe’. I search and make my own conclusions on the facts that present to myself.”</p><p>Kara drops the file into Lena’s lap, challenging her to say out loud what conclusions she got from her private investigation. And, Lena doesn’t hold back, she makes very clear she doesn’t believe this is a good idea. She believes Kara is too young and naive to do this. She’s too broken, emotionally and financially, to do this. Lena says all she gets from the file of Kara, nothing good to be honest, and Kara should feel offended, but she smiles. She just smiles, and Lena frowns because of all the reactions she was imagining, a smile wasn’t one of them...</p><p>“Miss. Danvers, are you smiling?”</p><p>“Yes…”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Why not?”</p><p>Lena’s frown deepens. Maybe Kara is more emotionally unstable than she thought. But, Lena gets rid of those doubts when the blonde expresses what she thinks about herself…</p><p>“You’re right. I was a runaway before I found Clark. I left my adoptive family. But, it wasn’t because I wanted, I did it because it was what they wanted… what they needed from me…”</p><p>Lena gulps hard. She feels sad for Kara, and angry at the same time. Who would have the heart to kick out a child? The blonde was a teenage girl when she walked away from the Danvers. Maybe Eliza would have asked her to stay, but Kara wasn’t going to be a breaking point between Eliza and Alex. </p><p>Alex lost her father because of Kara, that’s what the blonde really believes, so she wasn’t willing to make Alex lose Eliza too.</p><p>Eliza would have never chosen between the two girls. She loved them too much to do such a thing, so Kara had to be the bigger person and leave, for the well-being of Alex. </p><p>“My life has been more pain than joy. Always surrounded by Death. I don’t expect you to understand what this baby will mean to me. It’s not just about helping Clark to make a family. It’s about settling a bet with Karma. And, finally makes the Universe understand, that I can bring more than Death to this world. I can bring joy…. I can bring hope… I can bring life…”</p><p>Kara looks Lena in the eyes, exposing her soul &amp; heart, letting her know, she was speaking with nothing but the truth.</p><p>“I’ll bring Clark &amp; Lex’s baby into this world. With or without your help. But, from what I heard from Lex about you, I believe you need this just as much as I do. An opportunity to show to the world that we are more than what any file can say about us”</p><p>Lena has no words. All her conclusions about Kara’s personality were wrong. The blonde might have a dark past, a sorrow to carry. But, she’s strong, she’s tough, and she's the perfect choice to carry a Luthor. </p><p>Lena gets on board with the idea. </p><p>In secret they make all the preparations in Lena’s lab. No one knows about their little project. But the project gets its first obstacle when they find out that Lex can’t have kids.</p><p>“I’m sterile?”</p><p>Lena nods, she’s as shocked as Lex when she got the data of Lex swimmers. He cannot help to procreate this child. And, Lena decided to give the news to Lex in person, just to him while Clark and Kara weren’t around.</p><p>“Clark is not sterile, Lex. So, my suggestion is that we use Clark swimmers and the egg of a donor”</p><p>“We wanted the baby to have our DNA… the DNA of the two of us…”</p><p>Lena feels sorry for her brother, she can see how thrilled he was with the idea of having a child who carried his blood, but, that doesn’t seem an option anymore. Science doesn’t lie, there’s nothing Lex can do to bring life to this world. But, he’s not the only Luthor on Earth, right…?</p><p>“We could use one of your eggs…?”</p><p>“Excuse me?!”</p><p>Lex looks at Lena in the eyes, he knows he might be crossing a line to even consider this, but he wants this, and he really hopes that Lena will grant him this wish.</p><p>“Lena. I know I’m asking a lot. But, would you… could you donate one of your eggs, so I can have a child with the love of my life?”</p><p>Choices… we have so many choices in life. And, some of them change the course of our life in the most unexpected way possible…</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Life is short, life happens in a blink of an eye. Or, at least that’s what Lena felt when she got a call in the middle of the night...</p><p>“Hello? Who’s this?” </p><p>With a sleeping voice, Lena answers her phone. She sounds grumpy because it’s barely 3am in the morning. Who calls at 3am? Lena wonders, and she feels angry enough to snap at whoever is disturbing her rest because she already struggles to sleep due to her work,  and the last thing she needs is someone interrupting her dreams. </p><p>Being the CEO of an international company comes with a very demanding schedule, and Lena makes her life even harder because she’s a workaholic. The work is always first. Lena barely eats, she barely sleeps because she doesn’t make the time to get the rest she needs. And, when she finally gets a little time to herself, someone calls her very late. Is this a joke from the Universe? Or, a reminder that she doesn’t deserve to rest well at all? </p><p>Whatever is the reason behind this call, Lena is really upset,  ready to yell to whoever is calling at this hour, but, before she could snap, her brain decides to say nothing at all when the only thing she hears it’s the crying of someone else…</p><p>“Who’s this?”</p><p>Her heart pounds fast, and a cold chill spread over her body when she recognizes the phone number.</p><p>“K-K-Kara…?”</p><p>No reply, just sobs and crying is what Lena is able to hear, but, she knows it’s Kara, deep down, she knows it’s her.</p><p>“Kara, what is wrong?!”</p><p>Lena’s brain needs to hear a reason for a call at this late hour while her heart is telling her ‘<em> Don’t! Don’t ask!’. </em> Lena never follows her heart, so she asks again for a reason for this call. Between sobs, Kara finds the strength to finally speak out. </p><p>It’s when Kara starts talking that Lena realizes that she should have listened to her heart because she really doesn’t want to hear this at all. </p><p>In her fancy bed, in her luxurious penthouse, Lena wildly opens her eyes because once again, her world was turning upside down after another call from Kara Danvers.</p><p>
  <em> "Where do you think you'll be when you get old, Lex?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> "How old?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> "Really old..." </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lex shrugs, he has never wondered how he will be during his old-age. And, when he asks Lena why she's asking such a question when she's barely 8 years old, the younger Luthor replies... </em>
</p><p>
  <em> "I don't want to end like Mother. And you? Do you think you'll be like Father...?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> "I don't know... but, being like our parents. Is it really the worst thing that could ever happen to us?" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> For Lena, it was. Becoming her mother as time goes by, it has always been the biggest fear for her. But, Lex was right, getting old, like their parents, wasn't the worst thing that could ever happen to them. No, the worst thing that could ever happen, it's to never get the chance to get old at all... </em>
</p><p>"Miss Luthor, we’ve arrived..."</p><p>It was a Saturday morning when the chauffeur announced their arrival to Smallville. A little town with few people that knew about its existence. Passing by the streets, Lena wonders how Lex ended up in a place like this in the first place. From the window of her car, she finds nothing charming in the town that her brother chose to live in, and she might be right, there's nothing extraordinary in a little town as Smallville. But, this was Clark’s town. And that was enough for Lex to fall in love with the little town.</p><p>Smallville is where Lex decided to spend the rest of his life, beside his precious Clark. And, in a way that’s what he did, after all, they died, side by side… together…</p><p>They died together, that’s the only thing that Lena recalls from her talk with Kara. And, just thinking about it, it makes her sad, really sad because if it was her, she would have died alone… completely alone.</p><p>Right now there are so many things happening in Lena’s mind, in Lena’s heart; the bad news about the car accident, it makes her feel so many emotions at the same time. Sorrow, anger, fear… And, like any Luthor, Lena has never liked to deal with a turmoil of feelings. That’s why each time she gets to feel something which shakes her to her core, she shuts it down immediately, setting those feelings into little boxes she buries deep down in her soul. But right now, Lena doesn’t believe she has enough imaginary boxes to contain  all she’s feeling.</p><p>“STOP! STOP THE CAR RIGHT NOW!”</p><p>The driver suddenly stops the car. He has no idea why they are stopping in the middle of the road till he turns his head to his right, and notices the roadside memorial.</p><p>“This is it… this is where it happened, this is the spot where Lex…”</p><p>Lena can’t finish her sentence, she can’t pronounce the word because saying the ‘D’ word, it makes it real, it makes it true. And, Lena is not ready to accept that Lex is gone. Her big brother can’t be gone, that’s what Lena thinks over and over as she stares at all the flowers, and candles which mark the last place on Earth where her dear brother was alive.</p><p>Locals have already settled lots of flowers on the section where the car was found, crashed, and, in flames. Lena has never been a fan of looking at crime scenes, but, she needs to see this, she needs to be here, even if a big part of her wants to run away as far as possible, because this hurts… this hurts a lot.</p><p>The driver turns off the engine. He says nothing. He just waits for Lena to move, or give any order at all. But, she can’t, she can’t move, she can’t speak. She has this knot in her throat which doesn’t allow her to say anything at all.</p><p>“Miss. Luthor, the funeral will start soon, and…”</p><p>“I know…”</p><p>She cannot be late to the funeral, she knows that, but she can’t leave without leaving something here either, so Lena chooses the most beautiful rose she has in the big bouquet she has at her side, and taking a deep breath, she steps out of the car.</p><p>With shaking legs, Lena walks towards the roadside memorial. Her heels have never resonated so strongly as now. Maybe it’s because there’s no one on the road beside her, or maybe it’s because Lena focuses on the sound of her heels just so she can be able to keep walking without falling apart.</p><p>Among all the flowers, all the candles, Lena stands there, alone. She wasn’t there to see the car after the accident, but she has a very big imagination to picture in her mind the horrible scene. Broken glasses, screams of help, the sounds of the sirens…  </p><p>“From all the places you had to die. You had to do it in a place that couldn’t afford any of my medical devices…”</p><p>Lena strongly holds the rose she has in her hand, the thorns start to hurt her, blood drops, but, the pain that the thorns are causing her, it’s nothing compared to the pain Lena feels in her heart. </p><p>You never know how much people mean to you till it’s too late, till you can no longer treasure them. And that's what Lena is feeling right now. And, the worst part is that Lena believes that Lex didn’t have to die at all. The CEO of L-Corp is sure that if the hospital of Smallville would have had her medical inventions, her dear brother would still be here… alive.</p><p>Not all the hospitals can afford her expensive inventions. She could make the prices more accessible for everyone. But, she hasn’t done that… so, it’s her fault? Did she kill her brother? Did she contribute to his fatal ending? </p><p>It might be insane to blame herself for Lex’s death. But even still, Lena blames herself for it. She blames herself for not being closer and helping. She blames herself for not spending more time with Lex. So many Christmases, so many birthdays, so many memories they could have had, but didn’t. And Lena blames herself for it because her work was more important than family. Being the perfect Luthor was more important than being the perfect sister. And thinking about all the past decisions she has made, Lena gets angry with herself, regretting each one of them.</p><p>Lena has many regrets already, but she's sure that her biggest regret in this life will be to not have the guts to stand up for her brother in front of their parents. She wouldn’t have won the war, but, she would have let Lex know he wasn’t alone…</p><p>Alone… so alone is how Lena feels right now that Lex is dead. Because he’s gone, he’s really gone and Lena bursts into tears when the realization of the death of her brother finally hits her.</p><p>“Why?! Why Lex?! Why didn't you live forever…?!”</p><p>Lena yells to the sky, she curses the world, she blames herself for so many things, but mostly, for believing that her brother would live forever. But to be honest, there’s no one to blame, there’s no one to get angry at, because Death happens. Sooner or later, it knocks on our doors without saying why or when.</p><p>But, just as Death can arrive in our lives when we least expect it, life can arrive too… maybe when we need it the most…</p><p>“Kara, your belly is slowly appearing…”</p><p>“Yeah… I’m really pregnant even if I'm still not so big…”</p><p>Lena chuckles with happy tears when the first thing she sees when she arrives at the funeral, it’s a tiny belly for now, but it's there. With Clark’s swimmers &amp; Lena’s egg, they made a baby, a baby that Kara was willing to carry for Clarke &amp; Lex. The two men were supposed to raise this child, but they can’t anymore. They are not here, and Kara is not sure what she’s supposed to do now that they’re gone.</p><p>“I’m scared, I don’t know what to do now, Lena… I…”</p><p>“You’re not alone”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“You’re not alone”</p><p>Lena softly puts her hand over the belly of Kara and smiles when she feels the new life that is being created. </p><p>Kara smiles too. Lena’s hand is warm, and knowing that she’s here, at her side, it eases her mind. </p><p>They have lost so much, but, between all the sorrow, all the loss and Death. There’s hope… there’s life… there’s a baby on the way. A little ray of joy that will finally bring a little of light into their grey lives. And, that’s reason enough to smile… to keep going, even if they know that we are not meant to live forever.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What if people don’t live forever? What if people leave behind unfinished business? It’s hard to wrap our head around the idea of what happens next when we’re gone. And it’s absolutely sure that neither Lex nor Clark ever imagined that their unfinished business would put Kara and Lena under the same roof.</p><p>“Come in, come in, please”</p><p>Lena says as she brings in the little suitcase that Kara brought with her. The blonde doesn’t have a lot of personal belongings. Contrary to Lena, she doesn’t have dozens of shoes, or fancy clothes. Most of the things she has, they are things she got from Clarke &amp; Lex.</p><p>Sadness spreads over her when Kara thinks about them. Because just like Lena, she blames herself for their death. They weren’t supposed to be on the road so late, but they went out to get ice cream for Kara. The blonde had the cravings for it, and they wanted to please her appetit. Because of her, someone she cared deeply died again, that’s what Kara tells to herself, and that's the torment she’s having in her mind when the other woman brings her back to reality when she calls her name.</p><p>“Kara, please come in…”</p><p>The blonde blinks when she realizes that she hasn’t moved at all. She’s standing in the entrance of the penthouse while Lena is moving her suitcase into the guest room. How is that she’s here in the first place? Kara wonders, and once again, she gets lost in her thoughts, recalling their conversation after the funeral…</p><p>
  <em> “It was a nice funeral… I wasn’t expecting so many people to come…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> A Luthor’s funeral, filled with people who had nothing bad to say about the deceased person is nothing that Lena has ever experienced till now. In a way, it eases her pain to know that Lex was loved by someone else besides Clark.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Yeah, they have lots of friends. The people around here loved them too. They all came, but…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “But…?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> They stare at each other, Kara is not sure if she wants to ask or if she has the right to ask. But, she doesn’t need to because Lena has a pretty good idea of what is happening inside Kara’s mind… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “It was too naive for you to think that my mother would come. You didn’t have to invite her.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “He was her son. She deserved to know, she…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “She killed Lex a long time ago in her heart when she kicked him out of the family. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena says such words with a bitter voice. Deep down, just like Kara, she was expecting to see Lillian in the funeral. But, Lillian didn’t show up, she hasn’t said a word to Lena since she got the news about the death of Lex. And, Lena has no idea why she’s disappointed about it. What was she really expecting? That Lillian would show up and act like a real mother? That she would be there and mourn the death of her son like any normal human being?! Lena mocks herself for even imagining such things.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Forget about Lillian. We have more important things to discuss…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “We do?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena raises an eyebrow when a confused Kara looks at her. ‘Does she really have no clue about the ‘big’ notorious matter she’s carrying?’ Lena wonders, but, regardless if Kara is playing dump or she’s really just so oblivious to the situation, Lena decides to get straight to the point when she asks about the baby. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The blonde softly rubs the belly of a few weeks. It’s too late to disrupt the pregnancy, and even if it wasn’t, she would never be able to kill anyone by choice, especially a baby. So, the only option is… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I’m going to give birth to this baby, Lena…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “And then what?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara sighs because she has no idea how to reply. And, when Lena starts to ask one question after another, Kara’s mind fills with doubts and question marks. Can she raise a child? Can she take care of another human being? She doesn’t have any money or support system to ensure the well-being of the baby. And, to be honest, Kara is not sure if she can become a mother neither. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Girls grow up playing the house, dreaming about becoming mothers, getting the happy family and the fancy house. But, that has never been the case for Kara or Lena. They didn’t dream this, they didn’t ask for this for them. However, they are here now, with a baby on the way and, without a clue of what to do with respect to the actual situation.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I don’t have all the answers, Lena. I don’t know what to think or what to feel. All I know it’s that I made a promise. I promised Clark &amp; Lex that I would give birth to their baby. And, that’s what I will do.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s very noble what Kara wants to do. But, it’s unrealistic to think she can do this alone. Lena wasn’t there for Lex, every time he needed it. She regrets that. And, she’s not gonna commit the same mistake with his child, so… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I wanna help. I’m going to help.” </em>
</p><p>And, that’s how right now, Kara is standing at the entrance of Lena’s penthouse. Because somehow, in Lena’s book, helping Kara during the pregnancy means to welcome her into her home. </p><p>Lena moves in all directions. She’s nervous. It’s the first time she welcomes anyone at her home. Not even Lillian or her CFO and only friend, Sam, have ever put a foot in. Lena never imagined that welcoming someone she barely knew into her home would be such a big deal for her but it is. Kara finally steps in and each step of the blonde, it makes Lena’s heart rate to raise to the sky. </p><p><em> ‘ </em> What the hell I’m supposed to do now?! <em> ’ </em>Lena wonders. Should she offer her a cup of coffee? Of course not! It’s not recommended caffeine during the pregnancy. Maybe a soda then, she can drink soda, right? Lena frowns because she has no idea what is safe to offer. If she has no clue on what is the most appropriate beverage to offer for a pregnant woman then how is she supposed to help?</p><p>Not having the right answer it’s something new for Lena. She’s super smart so why can't she figure out this? Panic sets in Lena and it doesn’t get unnoticed by Kara...</p><p>“Lena, are you feeling okay?”</p><p>The blonde wonders why the dear Luthor looks so pale. Did she get sick during the trip? Or worse, is she having second thoughts about this? If Lena is already regretting the arrangement, Kara will not force her to help.</p><p>“I shouldn’t be here, should I? This is your home, you don’t know me... I should go…”</p><p>Kara’s first impulse is to run away. She doesn’t need to hear Lena saying the same words her foster sister Alex said to her years ago. She doesn’t need to get kicked out again from a home which is not hers. So, she turns around, ready to run away again like when she walked away from the Danvers years ago. But contrary to that time, this time, someone stops her, wrapping her by the wrist, forcing her to stop running. </p><p>Kara turns around and looks at the most beautiful green eyes she has ever seen. ‘Have her eyes always been beautiful?’ Kara wonders as she gets entranced on those beautiful emeralds. </p><p>Sharp and soft all at once. Lena’s eyes are something else. Green like the grass that revives after a cruel winter. Green like the forest of Midvale. Kara gets lost in Lena's eyes, remembering Midvale’s forest, a place she loved so much, a place she called ‘home’. And somehow, those beautiful green eyes which express so much more than what the dear Luthor is ready to say, they feel like home, especially when Lena finally finds her words and says...</p><p>“Don’t leave, please…”</p><p>It was a whisper, a plea that Lena wasn’t sure why she offered in the first place, but when she saw Kara ready to leave, the words came out of her mouth before she could process the meaning of them. Begging, asking for something, it’s something Lena hates. She doesn’t like to admit when she needs something she can’t provide herself. But, she has recently lost Lex and right now, she cannot afford to lose anything else, so…</p><p>“Don’t leave, Kara…”</p><p>From before she can remember, no one has ever asked her to stay. ‘Stop running!’ Kara’s inner voice yells so loudly that Kara is compelled to stop. For the first time, Kara stops running away and Lena softly smiles because both of them need to hold onto something and that ‘something’ is each other even if they’re not ready to admit it.</p><p>“I’m sorry if I made you feel unwelcome in my home, that has never been my intention.”</p><p>“But, you look conflicted about my presence here... Am I right?”</p><p>Admitting discomfort or weakness is another thing Lena hates, but somehow she feels she can allow herself being vulnerable around Kara and maybe that’s why she decides to be completely honest about her inner fears.</p><p>“It’s true that I feel conflicted. But, it’s not because I don’t want you here, it’s because I have no clue of what beverage I should offer you…”</p><p>Kara raises an eyebrow. ‘<em> She’s joking, right? </em>’ The blonde asks herself if all this drama started because of a beverage, she doesn’t believe it till she sees Lena making a google search for ‘what beverage to offer a pregnant woman’. And, while Lena concentrates on finding the best answer for her dilemma, Kara chuckles because it’s cute… Lena is really cute when she overthinks and worries so much about so little details like this one.</p><p>“Juice… no, maybe milk… do I have milk?” </p><p>Kara loudly laughs as she hears Lena’s rambling. As humiliating as it can be for Lena to admit she has no clue of what she’s supposed to do, it’s a big relief for Kara to see she’s not the only one clueless during the pregnancy.</p><p>“Don’t laugh, Kara. It’s not funny!”</p><p>“I’m not laughing at you, Lena. I’m just chuckling because I find it cute how much you worry about such small things like what I can or cannot drink. It’s cute really, you’re cute.”</p><p>Lena’s cheeks get painted with pink. Blush spreads over the pale cheeks of the dear CEO because this is the first time someone has called her ‘cute’. And, to be honest this is not gonna be the first time that Kara will make her blush because later that night, after a sweet cup of cocoa and a marathon of tv series, Kara falls asleep on the sofa, besides Lena.</p><p>Kara’s tired head drops over Lena’s shoulder and the dear CEO stiffens when she feels the warm contact. Lena holds her breathing. Should she say something? Should she move? Lena has no protocol to follow in a situation like this one, and it gets worse when, in between dreams, Kara hugs Lena’s arm.</p><p>
  <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCBB2020/works/26863552">https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCBB2020/works/26863552</a>
</p><p>She should wake her up, she should remove herself from the sleeping blonde but Lena does nothing else besides stare at Kara while she sleeps. The blonde is gripping on her hard, like if her life was depending on it. And, realizing that someone depends on her, that she’s accountable to someone other than herself, it makes Lena smile because someone needs her, really needs her. It’s a new feeling she’s liking really fast. It also means she’s not alone. She doesn’t feel alone anymore. And with the warm feeling of having someone at her side, Lena falls asleep too. </p><p>We don’t live forever. Leaving unfinished business is something we might not be able to avoid. But, maybe that’s for the best. Maybe that’s what the Universe has planned so, others can continue what we started. And, maybe… just maybe… Clark &amp; Lex real unfinished business was to bring these two together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Check-out the fn art done by the amazing Nora for this ch!<br/>https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCBB2020/works/26863552</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>How do you like to start your day? Are you a morning person? Because Kara isn’t. Or, at least she wasn’t…</p><p>
  <em> “Kara…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The grumpy blonde doesn’t reply, she just covers her head with the blanket. Clark chuckles, finding it very cute. His cousin sometimes acts like a little kid and it’s cute, so cute that Clark would love to let her sleep all the time she wants but they have their 1st doctor appointment today, and, it’s important so... </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Kara… Kara, wake up...” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Clark just hears groans coming under the blankets. With the eyes closed, Kara refuses to wake up, even when the rays of sunshine illuminate the room when Lex opens the curtains. Lex raises an eyebrow because even with the light of the sun, the girl refuses to wake up. The smart Luthor doesn’t know what else to do, but Clark has an idea of what they can do to wake her up. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> For a moment the room stays quiet, and Kara deeply signs. ‘I can keep sleeping’ was the feeling of the blonde when no one continued to wake her up. Kara was ready to return to dreamland, but she wasn’t ready for what Clark had planned to wake her up.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> A delicate sweet aroma enters the room, it doesn’t go undetected by the blonde, especially when she inhales it and recognizes the flavors. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Hmmm… pancakes…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara mumbles with the eyes closed. She hasn’t opened them yet, but she can already see what is waiting for her. The golden syrup cascading the yummy, puffed cornmeal. With the berries from the Kent’s garden on top of the spongy circles. The perfect picture if you ask Kara. And, the perfect way to get her out of bed. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I knew that this would wake you up" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Clark smiles when he sees his dear cousin, devouring the plate of pancakes. Lex just chuckles because, of course it’s food, the only way to get to Kara, just like Clark. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You’re definitely family" </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Clark and Kara stare at each other and giggle under the comment of the dear Luthor. And yes, Kara as well as Clark, she loves to eat. She can eat anything, except green things. Vegetables are her Kryptonite just like for Clark, something that Lex wants to change, but it's easier to say than done. Even so, it’s not just the food what Kara loves, it’s all the affection, all the love and tenderness that Clark conveys in the pancakes. They are made with love, and Kara can feel it in each bite. So, yeah, Kara is not a morning person, but since she’s with the Kent’s that feeling changed because each morning, there’s always the sweet aroma of Clark’s pancakes which makes her open her eyes with a big smile… </em>
</p><p>“Hmmm… pancakes…”</p><p>Kara mumbles under her sleep at the memory of those days, she wakes up with a big smile which vanishes quickly when she’s sadly reminded that those days are over. Clark is no longer here to make pancakes, there’ll no more that sweet aroma which would force her to wake up each morning. And, the realisation of what is lost once again, it brings a big sadness in Kara’s heart.</p><p>With the eyes open, Kara deeply exhales when she wakes up to her new reality. One part of her wants to cry, but she quickly rubs her eyes, trying to keep it together, trying to look strong for the baby she’s carrying. It’s easier to say than done, and, maybe that’s why the first thing that Kara does when she wakes up, it’s to try to make pancakes…</p><p>“I can’t promise they will be as good as those of Clark, but, I’ll try…”</p><p>The blonde talks to the baby inside her belly and gets ready to prepare breakfast. Yeah, Kara likes to start her days with pancakes. And, if you are wondering how Lena Luthor likes to start her mornings, the answer is simple: with a cup of freshly brewed coffee. </p><p>From the crushing sounds of the coffee beans till the exquisite smell of the black substance once it's served, Lena enjoys nothing more than starting her daily life making coffee. So, you can imagine her disappointment when she's no longer able to have the only thing she loves in her life because... </p><p>"What the heck?! This kitchen is a mess!" </p><p>Losing control is not a good thing. It's not acceptable for Lena, so you can imagine her shock when she realizes she has no control at all to what happens in her home anymore. An open milk over the kitchen table, flour and egg shells on the table, the floor. And, let's not start talking about the mess around the coffee machine because Kara's pancakes mix is all over the place and Lena is this close to have a massive migraine because she doesn't have the time to clean and make her coffee. </p><p>Deep breaths, counting till 10... What should she do to not snap? Her spotless kitchen is a complete mess. And with such a view Lena realises that her mornings are far to be what they used to be. Those quiet, calm mornings where it was just Lena &amp; her coffee are gone. Now, this is her new reality. Can she really make it work? Lena is wondering if she will be able to endure the challenge. So lost in her thoughts that she completely unnotices the blonde who’s serving pancakes on a plate for her.</p><p>“Lena, you’re up! Here, I made them! ME! And, they’re eatable!”</p><p>The blonde is so proud of herself. It’s not a secret she has zero skills in the kitchen, so, even if the pancakes look like a cooked stain, without a real shape of a circle, they’re perfect in the eyes of Kara because she made them, thinking of Clark, she made them with love. And, she was really hoping that Lena could see that, but, the dear CEO was more worried about the look of her kitchen than the fact that Kara made pancakes for them.</p><p>“Lena, I…”</p><p>The CEO huffs and walks away, leaving the place without saying a word.</p><p>“I made pancakes…” </p><p>Kara sadly mumbles to herself because Lena doesn’t take the time to even hear her. The CEO leaves and Kara looks at the plate of pancakes with a sad face, the joy of making them is gone.</p><p>It’s so easy to hurt people without putting a finger on them. And sometimes we hurt others without willing it. Lena has no intentions to hurt Kara’s feelings, but, her cold attitude and indifference hurt the blonde more than what she could imagine.</p><p>A new routine settles between them, and, somehow, Lena finds herself always cleaning Kara's mess. It's not like Kara doesn't clean, she is willing to do it, but each time she does it, it's never the right way according to Lena. The dear CEO is a compulsive clean freak if you ask Kara. And an effervescent vexation is building on the house because they are not able to properly communicate.</p><p>The situation gets to its climax when one day, Lena finds herself in the tabloids under the news she has a pregnant girlfriend. A photo of her &amp; Kara with bags of groceries makes a huge buzz. Her phone doesn’t stop ringing, and before knowing it, Lena finds herself in front of lots of people, asking for answers.</p><p>Who’s the blonde? Kara. Is she ready to explain to the world who’s Kara for her? Absolutely NO! Because she really has no idea how to answer that question even for herself. And, what about Kara’s belly? Is she ready to talk about it? Because right now everyone is making the same question: It’s her baby? It’s Lena’s baby? Technically, it’s. She donated part of her DNA to make the baby. So, it’s hers, hers! Lena’s mind goes blank under such thought because becoming a parent wasn’t part of the plan, it was never part of the plan. Refusing to face the situation and deal with all the people around her, Lena goes home. She locks herself in her safe place and tries to calm her nerves with the help of her oldest friend…</p><p>“What would I do without you?”</p><p>Lena says as she looks at her bottle of whiskey. The seductive, amber liquid it’s what the dear CEO craves more than anything right now because it turns down the volume of her thoughts, of her fears. Drink after drink, the whiskey steadies her and Lena lets herself dwell in the moment of just drink rather than think.</p><p>Entranced in the golden glow of her glass of whiskey on the rocks, it’s how Kara encounters Lena. </p><p>“Lena…? Lena, are you okay?”</p><p>Kara was taking a nap when Lena came home. The CEO never arrives, so early, that’s why the blonde wonders why Lena is at home at this hour. She wants to help, she wants to talk, but right now all Lena wants it’s to drink. </p><p>Wrapping her fingers around the glass, feeling the keen burn on her tongue when the elixir gets into her mouth. Lena is trying to leach into the drink when once again, Kara tries to reach her with words. The CEO wants to ignore the voice, she wants to pretend she’s alone. But, Kara’s voice is like a buzz that Lena cannot get rid of. And, it’s annoying…</p><p>“Lena…”</p><p>“Leave me alone…”</p><p>Kara gulps hard, she’s scared when she hears the cold, empty tone of the CEO. She should walk away, that might be the best, but, when she sees Lena standing up to open a new bottle, she refuses to walk away. Alcohol is not the answer to anything and if Lena can’t see it, Kara is willing to do something about it, but the blonde wasn’t prepared to see Lena snap. </p><p>The effervescent vexation finally gets to its limit when Kara tries to put away the bottle of whiskey from Lena’s hands. Like a volcanic eruption, Lena loses her temper and into an act of rage, Lena smashes the bottle against the wall.</p><p>“LOOK AT WHAT YOU MADE ME DO! I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE! I…”</p><p>Lena’s anger soothes when she sees Kara, frozen in fear. Fear, so much fear is reflected in those beautiful blue eyes because the sounds of broken glass, the smell of liquor, it brings back old memories for the blonde. Those dark days with her drunk father, throwing bottles against her &amp; her mother, those days were supposed to be over but maybe they’re not over…</p><p>“Kara…? Kara, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I…”</p><p>The dear CEO tries to erase the fear from Kara’s eyes with words, but Kara is not listening a word of what Lena’s saying. Old fears run through her head, bad memories come back to life, cutting loose the chains of the monster that Kara fears the most, a monster that it doesn’t look like her father anymore, now it takes the shape of the woman who’s standing in front of her. Kara can’t deal with another monster, the monster cannot come back to life, that’s what Kara says to herself when she gets ready to run away and never come back.</p><p>“I’m not dealing with this again!” </p><p>“What? Again? What do you mean? I… Kara! Wait!”</p><p>The blonde tries to leave without turning back, Lena knows she scared her, but she ignores at what point she did it till she sees the blonde running to the door like if her life was depending on it. Now, it’s Lena, the one who fears the worst. Tumble into the abyss of fear is nothing new for them, they are familiar with the feeling, they know it too well. But, running away from it, it’s not the answer, and, that’s why Lena goes after Kara, trying to understand the fear she saw in her eyes.</p><p>“Let me go!”</p><p>Kara yells when Lena holds the knot of the door, the blonde is shaking, trying to pull away her hand, but because of the fear she lost all her strength. </p><p>“Lena, let me go!”</p><p>“No! Let’s talk about this first!”</p><p>Kara laughs at Lena’s words. She finds it ironic how now Lena wants to talk now, when she was the 1st to refuse to talk at all.</p><p>“You want me to leave you alone, so, let me go!”</p><p>“No!”</p><p>The dear Luthor fears that if she lets her go now, she will never see her again. And, she cannot let that happen. Lena is not ready to see Kara, walking away from her life just like that, so like a broken record, she doesn’t stop saying how sorry she’s. Kara doesn’t want to hear it, she has heard it before, the empty promises, the empty apologies, she’s not willing to listen, all she wants it’s to run away from there as soon as possible, but…</p><p>“Auch!”</p><p>“Kara? What is wrong?! Kara!”</p><p>The blonde curls in pain, her hands hug her belly and somehow other fears invade their minds. </p><p>“KARA!”</p><p>Lena, saying her name it’s the last thing that Kara remembers before everything becomes black. She doesn’t know how long time has passed, but, when Kara opens her eyes again, it’s already dark.  She’s trying to figure out how she ended up in her bed when she hears the constant prayers of someone who’s strongly holding her hand.</p><p>Turning her head, Kara looks surprised when she notices Lena knelt beside her bed, holding Kara’s hand between her hands as she pray for her well-being. Kara gulps hard when she sees the tears and anguish settle on Lena’s face. A doctor came to check on her, he said it wasn’t nothing major to worry, but, Lena was out of herself, she was terrified to Death! And, nothing could calm down her worries besides hearing the sweet voice of…</p><p>“Kara!”</p><p>“Hi…”</p><p>The blonde is awake, and Lena bursts into tears again, sobbing how sorry she’s. The fear that Kara felt a moment ago is no longer there when she sees the tears of the dear Luthor, somehow, Kara doesn’t want to run away again, she just wants to hug Lena and calm down her worries.</p><p>“It’s okay. I’m okay. The baby is okay…”</p><p>Lena continues crying under the embrace. And, it’s till there are no longer tears to share when they can finally have a real talk.</p><p>“I didn’t know your father was an alcoholic”</p><p>Kara shrugs, she doesn’t want to make a big deal about it, but, it’s a big deal, it explains why she looked so scared when she saw Lena intoxicated with alcohol. </p><p>“My father was a good man. But, he was also a monster who used to throw us things to me and my mom. When you smashed the bottle of whiskey against the wall, it brought back old memories. Dark days I thought I had left behind…”</p><p>Lena gulps hard, she’s angry with herself for opening old wounds in Kara. She cannot do anything to erase those bad moments. But, she can do something to make sure it never happens again.</p><p>“Lena…?”</p><p>The dear CEO walks away in silence, Kara frowns, not sure what is coming on. The blonde follows her and gulps hard when she sees Lena pulling out all her liquor. Bottles of champagne, of wine, of whiskey. Expensive bottles are put together close to the sink of the kitchen.</p><p>“Lena, what are you doing?”</p><p>Lena doesn’t reply to the question of Kara, she just takes the first bottle she sees and holds the whiskey bottle between her hands, mapping the golden letters of the label of the liquor with her fingertips, the dear CEO deeply exhales as she prepares herself to say good-bye at her oldest friends...</p><p>“I’ve also faced my demons with this. But, I guess it’s time to face my demons alone”</p><p>With a deep longing to not let go. Lena hesitates on pouring the bottle into the sink. She doesn’t see herself as an alcoholic, but, it’s not a lie, she relies on the liquor to not deal with her emotions. She doesn’t think she’s strong enough to deal with feelings without the support of her dear liquor. But, one gaze towards the pregnant blonde is enough to force her to open the bottle and pour the entire bottle into the sink.</p><p>Once the bottle is empty, Lena grabs another one and proceeds to do the same. Bottle after bottle, Lena is getting rid of all her liquor and Kara stays in silence, just watching with watery eyes. </p><p>How much would she have loved to see her biological father doing the same? Maybe her father didn’t do it for her, but Lena is doing it now and the dear Luthor has no idea what big deal is for the blonde. Maybe that’s why when Lena hesitates to dispose of the last bottle, Kara gets alongside her and softly puts her hand over hers, holding the bottle with determination when she says…</p><p>“You don’t have to face your demons alone. We can do it together…”</p><p>A tiny smile appears on Lena when the dear CEO realizes she’s not alone. For the first time in a long, long time, she’s not alone. And, that gives her the necessary determination to empty her last bottle of liquor without regret. Kara smiles a lot when she sees all the empty bottles, her smile gets bigger when Lena softly squeezes her hand and tells her that she doesn’t have to deal with her demons alone either.</p><p>From that moment, the racing vexation between them faded away because they finally understood the importance of real communication. It’s not easy, Lena is the kind of person who always locks her feelings into tiny boxes inside herself while Kara is the kind of person who judges and decides what is best for others before really considering the others’ position. Both girls have a lot to learn in terms of communication. But, it’s a work in progress they’re willing to work on. And, communication it’s not the only thing that will change in the house…</p><p>“Hmmm… pancakes…”</p><p>When the sweet smell gets into her nose, Kara believes she’s still dreaming, but…</p><p>“Kara… Kara, wake up…”</p><p>The sweet smell, a sweet voice calling her name. It feels so familiar that for a second when Kara opens her eyes, she expects to see Clark, but it's not him who’s holding a plate of pancakes. Lena gets shy when she sees a little of disappointment in Kara. It’s not like if she’s not happy to see Lena, it’s just that she’s confused about what she is doing…</p><p>“I… well… uhmmm… pancakes?”</p><p>Lena stammers, she has no idea of what to say. She has never made breakfast before for someone else. This is new for her, and scary because the last thing she wants to do, it’s to give Kara a tummy ache. Doubting about her culinary skills, she tries to walk away with the pancakes, but before she could run away, Kara grabs the plate of pancakes and puts a big portion into her mouth.</p><p>They weren’t the best she has eaten, but they were good, they were more than good because in each bite, Kara could feel the dedication that Lena puts on them. Lena made them for her, and that was enough to make her smile.</p><p>“Are they good?”</p><p>“The best!”</p><p>Lena smiles and chuckles with a little blush on her cheeks. </p><p>“I’ll make you more”</p><p>Kara nods with a smile. And, from that day, the longing of eating Clark’s pancakes appeased because now, it’s the smell of Lena’s pancakes what makes Kara wake up with a big smile.</p><p>What if people don’t live forever? What if we find other persons to fill the hole of the presence of those they already left? The question of what these two girls will become and what they will do next is still there. The realisation that they have lots of things to face is real. They haven’t figured out everything yet, but they know they cannot live forever in the memories of the past and the fear of what will come next. They need to face their demons together. For them, for the baby and maybe for the feeling which is slowly growing in their hearts.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What if we don’t live forever? People die and that can destroy us in an instant. The lost, the longing for what is gone. We are not ready to say goodbye but as hard as it’s to grieve. We can be restored, we can rebuild and become a whole once again with the help of those who are around us, especially if they know their way to our hearts…</p><p>“Hmmm, so many pancakes! I love it!”</p><p>The dear CEO chuckles when she sees how fast the pile of pancakes starts to decrease. It doesn’t matter how many times Lena has seen Kara devour a stack of pancakes in a matter of seconds; every time she gets surprised by it. It’s really impressive how much food can get inside that mouth or, maybe it’s the pregnancy. Lena wonders if Kara’s big appetite it’s due to the baby, but she couldn’t be more wrong, Kara’s a food lover by nature.</p><p>Pizza, burgers, hot dogs, pasta and mostly pot stickers it’s the day-to-day of Kara’s eating routine. Something that Lena wants to change because after reading so many books about pregnancy, she’s sure that they need to add more green to Kara’s diet. The question is just: how? Lena doesn’t have the answer, but, she has a hint of who might have the answer to her dilemma.</p><p>“Lena?”</p><p>“Hi Sam. Can I come in?”</p><p>The dear CFO of L-Corp nods, she wasn’t expecting to see Lena out of the office especially on a Sunday. Is Lena really going to ask her to work on something today? Sam really hopes not because she’s supposed to have a day in the park with her child, Ruby and her new girlfriend. Sam was looking forward to finally introducing her new lover to Ruby, so she really hopes she will be able to do it today. </p><p>Lena notices how Sam is lost in her thoughts and she wonders if her presence is not welcome at all. Before the dear Luthor could walk away, Sam drags her to the living room to sit and talk.</p><p>“Lena, I don’t know what brought you here. But, I’ll not let you chicken out so easily…”</p><p>Lena chuckles, she nods and when Sam offers her something to drink, she declines. Now, Sam is worried, Lena refuses to drink a glass of wine, it’s something huge! All kinds of alarm settle into Sam’s head because when did Lena ever decline a glass of wine?!</p><p>“Lena, since when don't you drink?!”</p><p>“I drink! I’m just choosing not to do it anymore!”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>Lena shrugs, not wanting to answer, but, Sam has a little kid who’s a little shy, so, she’s becoming an expert on reading people who refuse to talk…</p><p>“OMG! You’re stopping drinking because of someone! Am I right?!”</p><p>The CEO blushes, she pouts like a kid who refuses to admit something, and, like a kid, she avoids to answer the question and looks Sam in the eyes.</p><p>“Lena Luthor, changing her bad habits for someone. Wow, this guy must be really something…”</p><p>“There’s no guy, Sam!”</p><p>“Oh, then, it’s a girl?” </p><p>Lena gasps of shock and crosses her arms with a cute pout on her lips. Sam chuckles. ‘<em> It’s a girl </em>’ it’s what Sam thinks, but she will not push the dear Luthor to say more. Since the dear Luthor doesn’t want to drink wine, Sam makes some tea for them. It doesn’t take her too long to prepare the tea, but, when Sam comes back with the hot beverage, she notices how Lena is looking at the newspapers which are over the coffee table of the living room.</p><p>“Stop worrying about what is said in the tabloids. We all know that fake press is what sells the most.”</p><p>“And, what if it’s not fake…?”</p><p>“Huh?!”</p><p>Sam never understood why weeks ago Lena refused to sue the tabloids for the buzz they did about a picture of her with someone else. The dear CFO was sure it was fake, there was no way that Lena would have a secret pregnant girlfriend, but now she’s wondering if she was wrong all this time. After all, Lena has a very private life, she doesn’t share anything with anyone, so maybe…</p><p>“OMG! You impregnated someone?!”</p><p>Lena gasps in shock under such accusation, but, thinking about it, technically, she cannot deny it. Because she did the procedure, she gave the egg, she put the baby in Kara, and a tiny smile spread over her lips, feeling proud of doing such thing.</p><p>“OMG! You dog!”</p><p>Lena rolls her eyes and before Sam could say something else out of place, she decides to entrust the truth with her. Sharing her secrets with someone has never been something easy for Lena, but she will not deny that after saying everything to Sam, she feels lightweight. It feels good to rely on someone, but, as the minutes pass, Lena starts to wonder if she did the right thing because Sam hasn’t said a word… </p><p>“Sam, are you okay? Are you not saying anything…?”</p><p>“It’s your egg, it’s your DNA, it’s your baby…”</p><p>“Well, technically, yeah, but…”</p><p>From all the possible reactions that Lena was expecting, Sam hugging her wasn’t one of them…</p><p>“Sam?!”</p><p>“Lena! God! You’re gonna be a mom! I’m so happy for you!”</p><p>The CEO gulps hard when she hears the word ‘mom’. Technically, the baby was made thanks to her, but, is she really going to become a mom? That’s a question for which she doesn’t have the answer yet…</p><p>“Welcome to the club. I guess you’re here to ask for some tips, right?”</p><p>Lena nods, she doesn’t want to enter into the detail about her hesitation of what to do with the baby once it’s born, so she decides to just focus on collecting the information she needs to improve the diet of Kara. With a big pat on the back and a thumb up, Lena leaves Sam’s home.</p><p>“Don’t worry about the company or the press. I’ll take care of it!”</p><p>Lena is also not ready to face the world and share the news of the baby, so she just nods and really hopes that Sam will be able to take that weight away from her. Taking into account Sam’s advice, she makes some stops before returning home. Lena smiles when she notices that Kara is asleep, taking her daily nap like always, which means that she will be able to surprise her when she wakes up.</p><p>“Wow, so many books”</p><p>It’s the first thing that Kara says when she wakes up from her nap and sees Lena on the island table in the kitchen, surrounded by lots and lots of open books.</p><p>“Are you studying for a test or something?”</p><p>“What?! Of course not! I…. oh, you were being sarcastic...”</p><p>Kara chuckles and nods, it’s cute to realize that a genius like Lena Luthor can be clueless enough to almost miss her sarcasm. </p><p>Like every day, they have a light talk while Lena cooks for them. After a lot of fires in the kitchen caused by Kara, trying to cook, they decided to leave Lena the part of making the meals. It would be the safest for them. Banished from the kitchen, Kara settles the table and smiles when she smells the food.</p><p>“It smells good!”</p><p>“And, it tastes better! Just wait, Kara, you’ll love it!”</p><p>And, Kara was very sure she would love the meal like everything that Lena has recently made, but when the dear Luthor put her dish on the table, the happy smile of the blonde fades when she notices that there are just vegetables.</p><p>“Where is the meat?!”</p><p>“It’s a veggie lasagna, Kara. There’s no meat in it”</p><p>“WHAT?!”</p><p>No meat? Just green things?! This is the worst nightmare for Kara and any kid who doesn’t like to eat green things. And like a kid, Kara pouts, crossing her arms around her and refusing to eat at all. Lena sits in front of her and deeply exhales because she really made a big effort to find recipes with vegetables which could be yummy for Kara. </p><p>Lena doesn’t cook for herself, she started to cook for Kara and she really hopes that the blonde would make an effort to eat what she cooks.</p><p>“Kara, you need to eat vegetables”</p><p>“I don’t need to eat vegetables”</p><p>“Let me rephrase it, the baby needs to eat vegetables”</p><p>Kara wants to say ‘no’, but she's sure that Lena might be right about what the baby needs. The blonde refuses to eat green things, not even Lex was able to make her eat such a thing so she wonders if with Lena, it will be the same. Thankfully for her, arranging concession agreements is what Lena does for a living, and Lena is ready to start the negotiation...</p><p>“I know a restaurant where they sell the most exquisite pot stickers in the world”</p><p>Kara licks her lips just imaging them.</p><p>“Normal people need to make a reservation with almost a year in advance to get a table. But, I can get us a table for this month if, just IF you agree to eat vegetables”</p><p>Kara pouts, she’s not falling for the trick. She wants to eat the pot stickers, but she's not sure if the deal will be worthwhile till Lena adds that they also have the biggest menu of desserts in the entire city. The dear CEO smiles when she sees how Kara starts to eat the veggie lasagna without objection.</p><p>Lena always keeps her word and that’s why a few days later, she asks Kara what day would do to go to dinner. Kara blushes, she giggles, she’s like a teen who has been asked to prom for the first time. This is the first time that anyone invites her to a fancy restaurant and somehow now that she thinks about it, she worries she will fall short of going to such a place. </p><p>Refusing to eat pot stickers it’s not something that Kara would do. That’s why Lena doesn’t let go of the subject without a real reason, even if the blonde is not ready to show her insecurities…</p><p>“I’m a veggie now, happy!”</p><p>“Kara, you’re not a veggie, tell me the real reason you don’t want to go to the restaurant”</p><p>“Because… because… because…”</p><p>Kara stammers, trying to look for an easy exit, but when Lena looks at her the way she does, with those beautiful green eyes. Kara sighs and tells the truth. Definitely, she has a weakness for green things…</p><p>“I don’t have anything to wear for a fancy restaurant”</p><p>Lena chuckles, for a moment, she thinks that Kara is being sarcastic again, but then, she realizes that Kara is being serious. ‘Oh’, it’s the only thing that the dear CEO says. An etiquette problem has never crossed her mind, but she can understand how some people worry about their outfit. Decided to do something about it, she proposes to Kara to go shopping, but the blonde refuses to do such a thing. The last thing she wants, it’s to make Lena spend more money on her.</p><p>“Just forget about the restaurant! I don’t need to taste the most amazing potstickers in the world!”</p><p>The blonde walks away, she locks herself in her bedroom while Lena deeply exhales, thinking about what she should do. She doesn’t have a clue, and, that’s why the next day, Lena is still lost in her thoughts. </p><p>Taking a sip of her coffee, it's like heaven for the dear CEO. She cannot start the day without her dose of this black substance, something that Kara doesn’t get because of her, the most important thing in the morning is to eat pancakes. But today coffee doesn’t taste so good, and that’s because Lena doesn’t like how the restaurant thing ended. For some reason, she has this deep desire to make Kara happy, to make her taste the pot stickers she promised, so, if Kara is not willing to go to the restaurant, she will just need to bring the restaurant to her…</p><p>“Wow, what is this?!”</p><p>Kara says, surprised because the 1st thing she sees when she wakes up from her nap, it’s a chef in the kitchen as Lena settles an elegant table for two.</p><p>“You’re up! Good! Let’s sit and eat!”</p><p>“Lena, what did you do?”</p><p>“I’m keeping my word…”</p><p>Says Lena with a big smile and Kara just chuckles and blush under such a statement. The dear CEO pulls away the chair for Kara and the blonde blushes with such attention. The courtesy doesn’t end there, Lena puts music, candles, she serves them carbonated water in fancy glasses and she even puts a napkin on Kara’s lap when the chef brings the potstickers.</p><p>“Bon Appetit!”</p><p>“Lena, I didn’t know you speak French”</p><p>“There are a lot of things you don’t know about me, Kara”</p><p>“That’s true. So, let’s change that…”</p><p>They start to talk about everything and nothing. It was nice, it was perfect.</p><p>“You were right, Lena. These were the most exquisite potstickers of the entire world! Not! Of the entire Universe!”</p><p>Lena chuckles under the enthusiasm of the blonde. A big joy spreads over Lena knowing that she makes her happy. Without noticing it, making Kara smile, making Kara happy becomes the only thought in her mind, in her heart, especially when Kara stares at her with lovely puppy eyes. Devoted, playful, trusting. </p><p>No one has looked at her the way Kara does. And, Lena is starting to love the way Kara looks at her. The way she smiles at her. The way she’s always there waiting for her when she comes back home and the way she settles her mind free after a hard day at the office. </p><p>Somehow, not leaving alone doesn’t feel so bad after all. Having someone waiting for you, it’s a nice feeling. And, that’s how Lena finds herself in a new world which turns around Kara. And, she likes, she loves it! The blonde never leaves her mind, not even when she sleeps and it’s because of a particular dream where Kara kisses her that Lena wildly opens her eyes to the realisation that…</p><p>“OMG! I have feelings for her!”</p><p>Falling in love is the easy part; it’s admitting to yourself that it happened that’s hard. But, we don’t live forever, and sooner than later, these two girls need to realize that love has no limits and they can’t hide either run from it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Spring, the season when everything dead comes back to life. When everything takes on color: green, yellow, blue… so many colors, so beautiful colors. Yeah, Spring is the time of the year when all the flowers blossom, and one particular flower is blooming beautifully in Lena’s heart… her 1st love.</p><p>Did she plan for it? Definitely No. Did she wish for it? Maybe, because who doesn’t yearn for love? Real love. The kind of love which makes you smile like a fool without reasons. The kind of love which makes you feel invincible and fragile at the same time. The kind of love you didn’t know you needed it, but, once it hits you, you have no idea how you lived all this long without it.</p><p>Yeah, love can be so many things, but if you ask Lena. Love is defined by one simple word: Kara. And, as beautiful as it’s to have this feeling, Lena is determined to kill it. To smash the butterflies because she cannot fall for Kara, she just can’t. Their situation is already complicated to add feelings into the mix. They don’t need more drama in their lives, and that's why Lena makes all what is humanly possible in her to stop falling in love with the blonde. But, it’s that even possible?</p><p>Lena’s conviction is tested one day when Kara boldly says that she’s very horny. The dear CEO almost chokes when she hears her.</p><p>“Lena, I need your help”</p><p>“My help?!”</p><p>Lena becomes completely red, she has no idea how she’s supposed to help or better say, she’s not sure how Kara expects her to help with such a thing. They have read that hormones can go crazy in a period of the pregnancy, but, helping a horny, pregnant Kara wasn’t in any book that Lena has read about the pregnancy. Her heart beats so fast when dirty thoughts run in her mind. Lena strongly shakes her head, trying to clean her mind about such naugthy thoughts. </p><p>“Lena, I…”</p><p>“You need a doctor! Yeah, let’s go to the doctor!”</p><p>The dear CEO hopes that the doctor might have a miraculous cure that could help Kara. But, going to the doctor is not what Kara has in mind. The blonde takes a deep breath and with the eyes closed, she yells what she thinks might appease her horny hormones.</p><p>“Lena, I need chocolate! Give me chocolate!”</p><p>“Huh?!”</p><p>Kara explains how she read in an article that  eating chocolate can produce some endorphins in the brain which cause pleasure. </p><p>“Oh, so, you want me to look for chocolate…”</p><p>“Yeah… you look disappointed. Why?”</p><p>“Huh?!”</p><p>Lena’s cheek gets red again under such a comment of the blonde. Was she really expecting to help Kara in another way? Before she could get an answer to that question, she gets out of the house, and occupies her mind on buying all the chocolates she can find.</p><p>The chocolate really helped Kara, but it didn’t help Lena at all because hearing Kara, moaning, each time she tasted a new flavour was making Lena insane. Hearing Kara moan in pleasure is the last thing that Lena needs right now, and maybe that’s why she goes directly to the office. Trying to occupy her mind with work and erase Kara from her mind. </p><p>Burying herself in work, it has always worked for Lena. But, somehow, spending so much time at work, it doesn’t make her happy anymore. She longs for being at home and with Kara. Spending most of her day at the office, it feels empty now, and Lena groans, frustrated because she doesn’t find a way to walk away from her own feelings.</p><p>Her heart craves for Kara, just as much as Kara craves for food. And, there’s nothing she can do about it. Especially because sooner or later, she will go home and Kara will be there. Does this mean that maybe she shouldn’t live with Kara? Maybe if she doesn’t see the girl every day, these feelings will fade, but the simple idea of not having Kara in her home, it makes her sick. </p><p>“No! There must be another way!”</p><p>Lena is capable of doing anything, that’s what the entire world always says, so she needs to prove it now. She needs to stop these feelings to keep blooming. She will not stop living with Kara, but, she will need to put a certain distance between them, she needs to stop constantly worrying about the blonde. She must focus just on the baby and not on the person who’s carrying it. That’s what Lena plans to do, and her plan might have worked but, it didn’t because after all, Kara is Kara, the sun in the grey days. The bubble smile that Lena can’t wait to see each morning when she wakes up. And, the sweet girl who’s carrying her child. A child she’s not sure she will keep till one night...</p><p>“Lena! Lena! Come here!”</p><p>The dear CEO runs in the middle of the night when Kara yells, asking for her. With fear written in her expression, Lena lets herself into the bedroom she arranged for Kara.</p><p>“Kara, what’s wrong? What…?”</p><p>The blonde doesn’t reply, she simply grabs Lena’s hand and softly puts it over her belly. Lena frowns, not sure what is happening till she feels it too… the first kicking of the baby.</p><p>“OMG! The baby is kicking! Kara, he’s kicking! Strongly kicking!”</p><p>“Yeah, and, I’m sure that if you talk to him. He will kick more…”</p><p>Lena hesitates, but in the end, she gets closer and starts to speak to the baby. Kara was right, the baby reacts to Lena’s voice and, both girls look amazed about how the baby might understand them.</p><p>“He might become a genius just like you, Lena…”</p><p>Lena smiles, she starts to talk about how the Universe works, about galaxies, about the big questions that any human asks itself about the Universe. And, then, they get to the most important question of them all…</p><p>“What will happen when this baby is born, Lena? What do you want to do?”</p><p>Kara honestly asks because she knows what she wants. She wants to be part of this baby’s life. Because she loves him, she loves him so much. But, she will not force Lena to be part of their lives either. So, she asks the Luthor what she wants. What she yearns for. And, just like that, the question she wasn’t sure how to answer, it becomes the easier question to answer because…</p><p>“I want to hold this baby. I want to teach him about how the Universe works. I want to see his eyes glow of fascination each time he learns something new…”</p><p>Kara smiles under the sweet answer of the dear CEO. She can already picture it in her mind, the beautiful baby in the arms of Lena, as the dear CEO tries to explain to him the most complex theorems of the World. The blonde chuckles under such a beautiful picture, and, she nods, admitting she wants the same. </p><p>Lena smiles, she hugs the blonde, so strongly that Kara gets the need to pee. But, it’s okay because now they know what they want. Or, at least a piece of the puzzle is already settled. </p><p>Time flies and before knowing it. They are in the last trimester of the pregnancy. Kara’s belly is huge, the blonde struggles to find a good position to sleep each time because her back hurts, her feet hurt, all hurts. But, miraculously when Kara sleeps in Lena’s bed, nothing hurts and the blonde  is finally able to rest. That’s why they started to sleep in the same bed. And, obviously the distance that Lena wanted to create between them becomes nothing as soon as Kara moved into her room.</p><p>Lena never thought that there would come a day she would be willing to share her personal space with someone else. But, she would be lying to herself if she didn’t admit how much she loves to have Kara at her side each night, each morning when she wakes up. The blonde is a hugging person, and somehow Lena has become her favorite Teddy bear to hold under her sleep and the dear CEO doesn’t complain, but, she can’t sleep well either because her heart raises to the sky each time she feels Kara’s body pressed against her. Their new sleeping arrangement, it’s not the only change because now the impeccable Zen apartment of the dear Luthor looks more like a toy store. </p><p>It’s very probable that Lena went too far with the shopping for the baby. But, it’s so hard to choose what will be the perfect crib, the perfect stroller that before knowing it, Kara found Lena buying the entire store they visited in their 1st day of shopping.</p><p>“God! This baby will be so spoiled…”</p><p>Lena chuckles under the comment from the blonde. She might be right, thinking about it... between Kara’s taste in food and Lena buying stores of toys for him. This baby might be the most spoiled child in the history of humanity. Thinking about what will be raising this kid together, once again, Lena’s heart craves for something more, for the feeling that Lena has tried to keep down for months. </p><p>And, as much as Lena wants to deny she doesn’t have feelings anymore for Kara, such an idea is thrown out of the window the day of Ruby’s birthday party. Lena was planning to go alone, but Sam insisted that she should bring Kara. The CEO didn’t want to come with Kara, she didn’t want to look like a couple even if deep down, she wished they would be one of those happy couples you see in romantic movies. Lena deeply sighs, she shouldn’t think about that and that’s why Lena thinks that going to the party with Kara is not a good idea, but Sam was right in one thing, Kara hasn’t really socialized with other people besides Lena. </p><p>And, even if Lena would love to keep Kara all to herself, she wanted to give the chance to Kara to talk with other people. The blonde was thrilled with the invitation to the birthday party. And, she got happier when she saw all the sweet things that Sam was offering.</p><p>Lena chuckles when she sees Kara chasing the candies as all the kids in the party. The CEO was apprehensive about bringing Kara to the party, but, when she notices the happy smile of the blonde who cannot stop playing with the kids, Lena realizes she did the right thing in bringing her.</p><p>“She’s lovely, Lena…”</p><p>Lena nods, she doesn’t need to hear from others how amazing Kara is, she knows it, her heart has known it for months. And, maybe that’s why it’s so hard to kill these feelings she has for her. Lena is not ready to face how strong is her love for Kara, just as Kara is not ready to face someone from her past...</p><p>“Alex…”</p><p>“Kara…”</p><p>Both women freeze in front of each other. They can look different to people now, but they will always be able to recognize each other no matter what. Kara unplugs herself from reality for a second. Her mind is far away as Alex tries to talk to her. From the distance, Lena watches how this woman tries to touch Kara’s arm and a strong feeling of jealousy overwhelms her senses. </p><p>Lena rushes towards them, ignoring who this woman is till Sam approaches too. Kara wondered what the hell Alex is doing here, but she gets her answer when Sam introduces Alex as her girlfriend. Sam didn’t know about their history, but Lena definitely recognized the last name: Danvers, from the file she got about Kara’s past. </p><p>Danvers, the family who welcomed Kara, the people who opened their doors to an  orphan as Kara with promises of love and a happy life, just to kick Kara out of their home some years later and throw her to the streets, to the cold world without hesitation. The CEO doesn’t know how everything happens, she just knows that what happened back then, it hurt Kara deeply and that’s enough to make Lena angry. </p><p>Lena’s rage goes to the sky, one part of her wants to punch Alex in the face, but, when Kara strongly grips on her arms, the dear Luthor understands that what Kara needs right now it’s to leave as fast as possible from here…</p><p>“Sam, we cannot stay. I’m sorry…”</p><p>“What? Why? Lena, what is wrong?”</p><p>Lena doesn’t want to explain any detail about Kara’s past, it’s not to her to share such things, it’s also Ruby’s birthday and she doesn’t want to make a scene. She just holds Kara and walks away from the party.</p><p>“Wait!”</p><p>Alex tries to go after them. There are so many things she needs to talk to Kara. So many errors she needs to make right, but, a protective Lena doesn’t let her get close to the blonde. With a lethal gaze, Lena makes Alex step back. The oldest Danvers wants to push her chances, but Lena will not let her get any closer to Kara. Ready to fight, Lena is like a lion, just waiting for the moment to show her claws and kill the threat. But, conflict is not what Kara wants...</p><p>“Lena, please. Let’s just go home…”</p><p>It’s the first time that Kara calls Lena’s place ‘home’. It makes Lena smile and gives her more reasons to look protective towards the blonde. Ignoring Alex, Lena drives them home, and, once they’re inside, she holds Kara in her arms when the blonde bursts in tears. Seeing Alex, it brought back painful memories, it opened old wounds, and, more than anything, right now all that Kara needs it’s a safe place, a place for her, and that place is Lena...</p><p>“It’s okay, Kara. You’re safe. You’re home. This is your home, Kara… I’m your home...”</p><p>Kara grips Lena, because for the first time in years, she finally has a place… a person... she can call ‘home’. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What if we don’t live forever or long enough to feel like we really lived? What is life without really trying and doing all you ever wanted? Most people dream with power &amp; money while few people like Kara dream with the greatest emotion in the world. The one that everyone talks about but just a few lucky ones have really the opportunity to feel it. Yeah, there’s nothing Kara yearns for, more than love.</p><p>Love, a word so simple and yet so complicated. Kara has read about it in so many poems, in so many novels. She can recite the most beautiful verses about love, but those words feel empty when her heart has never really had a real glance of such patient and kind feeling as romantic love. Seeing it in movies, on tv; it’s not the same as seeing it first-hand. And, Kara wonders if she will ever be able to feel it, to touch it, even if it’s just for a fraction of a second.</p><p>But what this blonde overlooks it’s that love is closer than what she thinks. Love is there, around her. Love is constantly looking after her. Always checking if she’s okay. Always looking at her through the most beautiful green eyes that the world has ever seen. </p><p>“Lena, why are you staring at me so much? Did I get something between my teeth again?!”</p><p>The raven-haired woman didn’t mean to stare too long, but she cannot look in another direction even when Kara tries to polish her teeth with her finger. </p><p>It’s the most disgusting thing that the brunette has ever seen in her life and yet, she cannot stop looking at it. It must be love. </p><p>Yeah, love is in Kara’s life even if she’s not able to notice it. Because Lena loves her, she loves her as she has never loved anyone else in her entire life before.</p><p>Meeting was an act of fate but falling in love was a choice. A choice that Lena would make over and over without hesitation because she has never felt more complete, more strong and fragile at the same time. It’s scary but also thrilling because she has always been curious to discover all the things the world has to offer, but love was never one of them.</p><p>Discovering what real love feels like, it was never part of the plan. Always driven by logic, Lena never dreamed neither long for love and yet, here she’s. In love. How did that happen? Because in the matters of the heart, the raven-haired woman has always been like a closed book till the sunshine known as Kara Danvers waltzed its way in her home, in her heart. </p><p>The blonde arrived in her life, opening a new chapter in Lena’s life. A chapter filled with color, joy, rainbows and the most corny selection of iconic movies.  Yeah, Lena has already lost count on how many romantic comedies she has seen since Kara moved in. She has never seen as much TV as now, but, to be honest, her eyes linger more on Kara than on what is happening on the screen.</p><p>“Look, look! This is my favorite scene!”</p><p>Lena doesn’t pay attention to what is happening on the monitor, she only has eyes for the happy smile which is forming in Kara’s lips. How can a smile bring so much happiness to her heart? Lena wonders. And beyond finding the answer to her question, her brain focuses on the lips. </p><p>Oh, those lips. So pink, so tender, so soft. The idea of touching them, to melt in them, brings color to Lena’s pale cheeks, so much color than for a second Kara wonders if she’s getting sick.</p><p>“You’re not getting a cold, right?”</p><p>Lena shakes her head, she doesn’t think the raise of her temperature is due to any germ which might be in the air. It’s because Kara is getting cozy, cuddling and leaning her head over Lena, completely unaware of what her touch is doing to the other woman. </p><p>A part of Lena is panicking, ready to run away as far as possible from the closeness, but another part of her brain is endorsing the closeness because it feels good, so damn good that Lena decides to bury her fears and insecurities in her tiny boxes so she can just focuses on how perfectly Kara’s head fits against her shoulder. The perfect fit, Lena thinks, wondering too if the blonde would ever think the same?</p><p>And to be honest, the blonde is not indifferent to the dear Luthor. From the first time their eyes met, Kara saw the beauty in Lena, a beauty which doesn’t just stay on the outside. The CEO also has a beautiful soul. Hidden between big icy walls to protect herself, Kara has been able to melt those walls and see what’s inside: a pure heart. A heart so kind, so perfect that Kara would love to just hold it tight, protect it and never let it go, but she can’t. She doesn’t allow herself to even touch it. Why?</p><p>Well, Kara is not the kind of person who likes to rely on people. Time after time, life has always shown her that she shouldn’t get attached to others if she doesn’t want to suffer. All she touches, all she cares about sooner than later ends badly. And the last wish of the blonde is to be a reason to bring any kind of misfortune to Lena. No, the brunette doesn’t deserve to end up like Clark or Lex. She deserves the world! So, she should walk away from Lena’s life before something bad happens, that’s what Kara tells to herself, and yet, she cannot stop glueing herself to Lena like a sticker. </p><p>She never saw herself as a clingy person but Lena makes her feel so safe, so happy that she wants to cling to the dear Luthor as if her life depended on it even if she’s sure that the raven-haired woman would be better without her.</p><p>All the loss, the sorrow, the guilt for the Death of those she loved so much. It blinds Kara to see what is in front of her, it paralyzes her to dream with more than this. But, if she could just open her heart and see how Lena looks at her. If she could just notice the devotion the dear Luthor has towards her, maybe she would feel less scared to take what she deeply wants.</p><p>But, opening the heart to someone, let someone in. It’s something neither of them is comfortable doing and maybe that’s why they are side by side, together but feeling as lonely as they did before they met.</p><p>These two are not ready to deal with their feelings and do something about it. They need a little push, a push which will be made by…</p><p>“Alex?!”</p><p>Kara opens the door and the last thing she was expecting to see there in front of her, it was her step sister. </p><p>Alex Danvers has always been a badass girl but somehow, she doesn’t look so scary now that she stands in front of her little sister. Her little sister is far gone, Kara is a grown woman now, but, in front of Alex's eyes, all she can see is the little blonde who always followed her everywhere. A girl that she had spent so many years looking for her and now she’s here. In front of her, without being able to figure out what should be the first thing to say.</p><p>“Can I come in?”</p><p>“How did you find me?”</p><p>It’s not exactly the welcome Alex wanted but she understands where that comes from. If she was Kara, she would act the same way or worse. Kara has all the rights to be defensive towards her. Alex understands that but what she doesn’t understand is why the moment Lena notices her, she goes to the defensive too.</p><p>“How dare you come here?!”</p><p>The dear CEO transforms into a protective lion, Kara tries to calm her down but she can’t. The brunette feels over-sensitive when it comes to protecting the pregnant blonde, and she’s more than ready to kick Alex from her building and fire whoever allows her to come this close to them. That’s what she yells till the person involved finally steps in, too.</p><p>“Lena, please. Let her talk…”</p><p>“Sam…?! What… no… you brought her here?!”</p><p>Sam gulps hard, she knows she crossed a line. Lena is not the kind of person who forgives these kinds of things, she knows what it’s at stake here. But, she opened her heart to Alex and she’s all in to help her on her request to make amends, even if that means she might have to go against Lena’s will.</p><p>“Lena,  please, you…”</p><p>“You’re fired.”</p><p>“Lena!”</p><p>Kara scolds the dear Luthor but Lena doesn’t change her mind, she angrily pouts and refuses to change her mind. Sam was supposed to be her right hand, the one she could trust no matter what. But, how can she trust in her when she brings to her home this kind of unexpected guest?</p><p>“Please, do not put this on Sam. She was just trying to help me! She…”</p><p>“She doesn’t have my trust anymore. I cannot work with someone I don’t trust…”</p><p>Sam gulps hard, it’s hard to hear. Painful even but she doesn’t regret her choices because after all Kara needs to hear what Alex has to say. It’s not just for the well-being of Alex, for what Sam knows by now about their story, she’s sure that Kara has too an open wound. And, that’s why she refuses to leave, just like that.</p><p>“Fine, fire me if you want, Lena. But, we’re not moving from here till Alex gets the chance to talk with her sister…”</p><p>Lena angrily groans, she was ready to call her security team, even the police if it was necessary but before she could hold her phone, Kara grabs her arm and stops her. The blonde doesn’t want to make more problems.</p><p>“Kara, you don’t have to talk with her, you…”</p><p>“I’m done running, Lena. Besides, I’m not doing this alone…”</p><p>The blonde slowly reaches for Lena’s hand and gets reassurance when Lena strongly holds her hand because she remembers very well the promise they did about facing their demons, their fears together. </p><p>It was easier to say than done, neither of them was used to lean on someone, depending on someone for support and maybe that’s why it’s too terrifying for them to admit the feelings they have for each other. Lena knows she loves but she’s not ready to say it out loud and Kara… oh, our dear Kara is so sure that everything she touches, everything she loves is cursed to die that she doesn’t dare to admit, not even to herself that she loves Lena, maybe more than what she could imagine. </p><p>But what Kara really needs to understand is that who lives, who dies, we don’t decide any of that, it’s out of our hands just like when love appears in our lives. And yet, Kara can’t see how much love is standing in front of her.</p><p>Still feeling responsible for some losses. The guilt, the grief, the loneliness. Kara knows those feelings too well. And maybe that’s why she finds it so hard to open her heart to new warm emotions like those that Lena creates in her heart. Even then, there’s no stronger and stubborn feeling than Love. So, no matter how much Kara will try to ignore it, to shut it down. Love will rise, Love will not stop holding her hand because Love is home, love has two beautiful green eyes, Love has a new name: Lena.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>What if we don’t live forever? What if you have just one chance to get it right in this life? We don’t always get second chances, an opportunity to amend our mistakes and maybe that’s why Alex is hesitating on what to do next.</p><p>How many times has she had this conversation in her mind? How many times has she dreamed with the day she would see her again? She, the little girl who was her bigger fan. She, the girl who followed her everywhere, looking at her with so much admiration and love. Just recalling those old days, a warm smile spreads all over Alex’s face till a very scary Luthor sits in front of her. </p><p>If looks could kill, Alex is sure that she would be already on the other side by now. The only question is why?</p><p>“You don’t like me…”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>Lena shows no hesitation in admitting she’s no fan of Alex. And Alex doesn’t understand why she’s getting this hostile welcome from her till the raven-haired woman decides to speak her mind.</p><p>“How dare you look for Kara now? You kicked her out! You put her in the streets when she was just a teen! And, now you’re here?!”</p><p>The CEO angrily bares her teeth. She’s losing her temper, she knows it but she cannot help it, especially  when she recalls all the things that Kara has told her about the past…</p><p>
  <em> “It’s raining…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara pouts when she looks through the window the storm that’s happening outside. The blonde looks unhappy because today was supposed to be a day on the park, they even prepared a nice picnic to eat outside but thanks to the rain, that plan is gone, or at least that’s what the blonde was thinking till she turned around and found Lena, moving the fournitures of the living room. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “What are you doing?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena doesn’t reply, she just moves the sofa and the coffee table so she can put some blankets and pillows in the middle of the room. The basket with the food comes next as well as the use of her new home theater she especially made for Kara. At the push of a button, all the shutters shut down, the entire place gets in the dark till the projection starts and somehow, they find themselves in the middle of a forest. The white walls are now green woods, slowly moving at the rhythm of the sweetly sing of the birds and ‘Wow’ is the only thing which escapes from Kara’s mouth. The dear blonde is amazed about how real it looks. It’s really amazing. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I can even hear the birds…”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara closes her eyes and smiles, letting her senses be taken by the perfect scenario created for her. The sun, breaking through the canopy of the forest. A few birds flying around, swinging from branch to branch as they chirp the sweetest melody that Kara has ever heard. A melody she knows too well, a melody from… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Midvale… OMG! This is the forest of Midvale!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Yes, you’ve mentioned how much you loved that forest so…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “So, you brought it to me…?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena nods, she smiles thinking she did a good choice of scenario for their picnic but she has second thoughts about her choice of set design when she sees tears appearing in Kara’s eyes. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Oh, God! You don’t like it!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena is ready to change the scenario but before she could touch her tablet and set the changes, Kara stops her. She asks her to leave it this way.It has been years since she left that place, she still sees it in her dreams but looking at it now, hearing the birds and their sweet song again, It’s more than what she could ever wish for.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I’m not upset, Lena. These tears are not because I’m upset, on the contrary, I’m… I’m… I’ve no words to describe what I’m feeling, but believe me when I tell you, this is good. This is more than good. Thank you” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena’ smile gets bigger when the blonde admits how much she loves the scenario. It’s the first time that Lena uses her brain to make someone else happy and that’s because making Kara happy, it makes her so damn happy, more than what she could ever imagine even if at this point Lena cannot really understand why.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> In the middle of the living room, they have their perfect picnic. And, even if Kara knows this is not the real forest of Midvale, she lets herself go to memoryland and before knowing it, she’s sharing all kinds of anecdotes with Lena. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I can’t believe you looked for Bigfoot in the forest of Midvale…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena chuckles, she can imagine Kara at the age of 12, camping out there, putting mud all over her face as camouflage. Waiting to catch a fantasy. It’s silly but also the cutest thing that Lena can ever imagine. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Don’t laugh, Lena! Bigfoot is real! I’ll find it one day to prove it!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Sure, you will darling…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The sweet nickname doesn’t go unnoticed by the two girls. For a brief moment, Lena panics, not sure why such a tender word slipped out of her lips. She’s sure that Kara will make a remark about it, but the blonde is more alarmed in hiding the blush of her cheeks than in understanding why Lena called her ‘darling’. With the hands cupping her own face, Kara mumbles something to herself as she shakes her head non-stop, she’s trying to calm down her heart and her mind. And once again, Lena gets to see that Kara is really the cutest thing on Earth. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena starts chucking and when the blonde notices her, she chuckles too, following her lead. Time flies, it’s already late and the night comes too into their private forest. The birds stop singing but their melody gets replaced by the sounds of the owl and the little crickets as the ceiling gets illuminated when the stars finally start to shine. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Just like h-....” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara gulps hard, she hasn’t called Midvale her home since she left. And, she sadly doesn’t dare to call it her home now. The brunette senses the change of mood in the pregnant woman, she doesn’t know why Kara looks so sad now, but if there’s something that can cheer her up, that’s food. That’s why Lena stands up fast and rushes to the kitchen, looking for something sweet because Kara loves everything that has tons of sugar in it, Lena has no idea of what she’s really looking for but when her eyes peek a bag of marshmallows, a great idea gets in motion, in her head. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Lena, what are you trying to do now?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The dear CEO doesn’t reply, once again she wants to surprise Kara but she groans, looking upset when she unsuccessfully tries to light up her chimney. It has always been just part of the decor, but she knows it’s functional even if she doesn’t know how. Kara laughs very loud when she understands that the smartest woman on Earth doesn’t know how to set a fire in her own chimney. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Here, let me do it…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Now, it’s Lena’s turn to look amazed when Kara quickly sets the sparking fire.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You’re good at this kind of stuff, darling. Now, I know who to call if I ever gets lost in a forest.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara chuckles, she blushes again with the word ‘darling’ but she doesn’t complain about it, to be honest, she likes it a lot, the idea of Lena constantly calling her ‘darling’, it makes her happy. Her brain starts to wonder why, and, Kara shakes her head, trying to shake off those kinds of questions from her mind. She doesn’t want to understand why she loves so much when Lena calls her darling, she just wants to enjoy it.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Trying to think of something else, Kara wonders if she would really be the best option to call if the other woman needs help in the forest, she doesn’t believe she’s the best option to call in case of emergency. Thinking about it, the best option would be to call someone like… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Alex. She’s the one you want to call if you need help to survive in the middle of nowhere” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Alex? Who’s Alex?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena wants to take it back, her question makes the blonde uncomfortable but before she could change the topic of the conversation, the blonde decides to reply. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Alex is… was my sister. Well, my step sister…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> A shy smile spreads over her lips as she recalls the dear sibling she cared for, so much. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Oh, I’m sorry for your loss, Kara.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “What? Oh, no! When I said ‘was’, I didn’t mean she’s… you know…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena nods, she understands that this Alex is not dead but she’s still confused why Kara used past tense to mention her relationship with the other girl. But, after all, who’s she to judge? She did the same with Lex. Everytime someone asked about him, she always talked about him as if he was gone forever. It’s sad now that she thinks about it, because now that he’s really gone, she cannot stop waking up, thinking she will see him again as soon as she opens her eyes each morning. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Both girls deeply sigh, looking sad as they recall their siblings. Just the cozy fire and the idea of putting marshmallows to roast on the fire brings warmth to their hearts. They are roasting the marshmallows when Kara decides to keep sharing something about herself. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I didn’t want to be adopted. When my parents died, I felt like I died too with them. I didn’t care about anything till I got to live with the Danvers. Somehow, they brought me back to life, they gave me reasons to live” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> A tiny smile appears in their faces as Kara keeps talking about all her favorite memories with the Danvers. Movie nights, camping in the middle of the forest, roasting marshmallows as they are doing it right now. Alex, defending her at the school. So many beautiful moments to remember that Lena doesn’t get what went wrong so Kara finished as a runaway. The raven-haired woman was about to ask when a cascade of tears started to drop from Kara’s blue eyes, this time they are not happy tears because Kara recalls the day Jeremiath died. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “He died. I’m sure he had the heart attack because of me! I killed him! It was my fault, our fight killed him and that’s why Alex asked me to go! To leave the house because I killed her father and I wasn’t welcome anymore…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lena gets a knot in her throat, she has no words to say, the only thing she can do, it’s to offer a shoulder to cry and Kara takes it, she buries her crying face on Lena who holds her tight. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Alex told me I killed him, just like I killed my parents, and, she’s right, I kill everything around me! Just like Clark and Lex…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “What?!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> ‘Oh no, she’s gonna hate me too’ it’s what Kara thinks when she understands what just slipped out of her mouth. Detaching herself from the crying woman, Lena shakes Kara from the shoulders, trying to force the girl to explain what she just said. Between sobs and tears, Kara explains how she blames herself for the accident of Lex &amp; Clark. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “They went out because I was craving ice cream. It’s my fault, Lena, I killed them!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Bursting into tears, Kara begs for forgiveness even if she doesn’t really believe she deserves it. The blonde was getting ready to receive the same kind if reponse like the one she got from Alex back then. Once again, she will be kicked out. Maybe Lena will also say horrible things to her, maybe she will also slap her face and look at her with nothing more than hate &amp; anger, just like Alex did. It will break her heart, but, she will understand, she will not hold it against Lena, just like she doesn’t hold it against Alex because she’s the one to blame.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yeah, Kara was getting ready to relive what happened years ago with Alex. Far she was to imagine that contrary to Alex, Lena’s love would be stronger than any other thought. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Oh, Kara. It’s not your fault, it has never been your fault. I’ve nothing to forgive, you did nothing wrong…” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Now, it’s Lena who cannot hold the tears anymore. Lena cries because it breaks her heart to think that all this time, Kara has been burdened with such guilt. Realizing that Lex might have died for a silly reason like looking for ice cream in the middle of the night, it makes her anger, but, that anger is not against Kara, her rage is against the cruel fate that was settled for her dear brother. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Fate can be cruel so many times, Lena knows that better than anyone else, she hopes Kara could understand that too but all Kara can hear in her head, it’s the harsh words of Alex, blaming her for the Death of all those she has ever loved. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “No, no, no! It’s my fault Lena! I killed them! I kill everything I love!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “NO! Kara, you didn’t kill Lex &amp; Clark. You didn’t kill Jeremiah and you definitely didn’t kill your parents, Kara!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kara starts crying again, louder. Deep down, she knows Lena is right, she’s not a killer but, she cannot let go of Alex's words, she cannot stop feeling guilty for causing so much pain to the Danvers and, that’s why from this moment on, the name of Alex Danvers will make Lena furious.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>It’s because of Alex’s harsh words that Kara takes the blame for everything bad that happens around her, it’s because of Alex that Kara became a runaway, a girl who barely survived on the streets, a girl who’s incapable to let love in because she’s too afraid to kill it too.</p><p>Yes, Lena doesn’t like Alex, she doesn’t like her at all! And, she’s trying to control her nerves by killing Alex in her mind over and over. Alex has no idea of the bloody scenarios that are running all over Lena’s mind, but, looking at the lethal gaze of the CEO, Alex gulps hard, feeling a cold chill, her senses of survival activate, settling a red alarm in her head.</p><p>“Sam, she wants to kill me, doesn’t she?”</p><p>“I don’t know, but she definitely has the resources to do it…”</p><p>Alex gulps harder, what her girlfriend just said, it doesn’t make her feel any better. And, a big devious smirk forms on Lena’s lips when she sees how scared Alex looks like, because of her. </p><p><em> ‘Good, be afraid’ </em> Lena thinks, because if Alex is here just to crash Kara’s heart once again, she’ll better get ready to live in hell because that’s what Lena will bring to her if she dares to make Kara cry ever again.</p><p>“Miss Luthor. Can you stop looking at me like that? It scares the shit out of me”</p><p>“If you don’t like how I look at you, you’re more than welcome to leave, Ms. Danvers…”</p><p>“You know my last name?”</p><p>“I know who you are and what have you done…”</p><p>“What I have done?”</p><p>“YES! What you’ve done! Because who do you think you are to ask Kara to take the blame for the death of your father! YOU b-…!”</p><p>Kara makes soft circles over Lena’s hand, the brunette deeply sighs, she can feel how her mood magically changes with the soft touch of the dear blonde. And that's why Lena holds her tongue, and just crosses her legs and arms as she tries to control the protective beast she has inside herself.</p><p>The room stays in silence for a long moment. No one dares to start the talk. Alex is feeling upset about the way Lena stormed against her, one part of her wants to walk away and leave but then she looks at Kara, at the blonde who’s already 7 months pregnant and she finds no other words to say than…</p><p>“You’re pregnant…”</p><p>Kara nods, she keeps her eyes on her lap as she nervously plays with her glasses. </p><p>“How is that possible?”</p><p>Lena rolls her eyes, she speaks on behalf of the two of them and clearly explains to Alex that is not her business and if she’s here to get the talk about how babies comes to the world, she should leave now before Lena changes her mind and shows her the real reason why everyone is afraid of the Luthors.</p><p>“I know what Luthors are capable of, believe me, I do. You don’t need to threat me”</p><p>Lena angrily hums, wondering what Alex is trying to imply. Alex &amp; her stare at each other without blinking an eye, it’s like they were getting ready to fight and Kara doesn’t like the idea of the two of them fighting so...</p><p>“Alex. You’re making Lena uncomfortable so, if you’re not gonna say anything then leave…”</p><p>Now it’s Kara who’s kicking her out and it’s a bitter feeling for the two of them. Alex knows she has to say something before it’s too late, she didn’t come to leave like that, but what do you say to someone you broke? How do you bring back to your life someone you horrible kicked out? </p><p>“Alex…”</p><p>“I’m sorry. Oh, god! I’m so sorry Kara...”</p><p>Alex bursts in tears, she covers her crying face with her hands, ashamed to show her face, ashamed of how she reacted to the death of her father. And from all the possible things that Kara thought Alex wanted to say, this was never one of them. Alex fully exposes her remorse. She never really wanted to kick Kara out. She understood her mistake the morning after it happened but it was too late to redeem herself.</p><p>“I thought you would come back the next day. I thought you would walk through the door and I would apologize and everything would be okay but you never came back.”</p><p>“Why would I return to the house? I wasn’t welcome anymore into your home…”</p><p>Alex gulps hard with tears in her eyes when she hears the harsh words of the blonde. The bubble girl who always smiled at her, is gone. Kara is not anymore the little sister who loved Alex more than anything else in this world and, Alex feels sad about it, mostly because she knows it is her fault. </p><p>“I’m sorry if I made you feel not welcome. But, you shouldn’t have left home, just like that…”</p><p>“It was never my home, Alex…”</p><p>“NO! Do not say that! It was your home! It’s still your home, Kara!”</p><p>Kara shakes her head non-stop, strongly refusing to agree on what Alex is saying.</p><p>“Midvale is your home, Kara! Your home is…”</p><p>“HERE! ME! This is her home! With ME!”</p><p>“Her home cannot be with a Luthor. I refuse to accept that!”</p><p>“And, I dare you to do something about it!”</p><p>Lena stands up, stiffening, imposing her authority. With a cold challenging look, it’s very clear that Alex is not feeling confident to contradict her, especially when she notices how Kara smiles when Lena says that she belongs to her. The blonde looks at Lena in a way that reveals more than what words could say, something that doesn’t go unnoticed by Alex. </p><p>“Lena is right, Alex. This is my real home, Lena is my home”</p><p>Lena smiles when Kara holds her hand, the anger is gone, the beast inside herself calms down because there’s just love, real love what Lena is feeling right now. Sam and Alex see how they  look at each other with nothing else than complete adoration and the dear Danvers has no idea about the real nature of their relationship, but, it’s obvious there’s something there, something she dislikes a lot because she knows something that Kara ignores. </p><p>Alex hates the Luthor name and she refuses to let Kara believe she belongs with a Luthor. But, will she able to get back her sister and separate her from the only heir of Luthor's legacy? Alex might lack what is necessary to split them off but someone else has all the power to break them apart with a simple snap of her fingers. And that person is no one else than the oldest Luthor alive.</p><p>Across town, Lillian Luthor deviously smirks when she gets into the big office of an old friend, loving the weight of her name when the other person looks at her with a little hint of fear. It’s good to be feared and to be honest, big part of the reason everybody is afraid of the Luthor name, it’s because of her. </p><p>Lillian is back in town, and a visit to Lena is on the agenda. The arrival of Alex has unchained something, something that will escalate to a whole other level with Lillian’s presence. Will Lena &amp; Kara be able to face together the secrets of the past? Or, will destiny be cruel once again with them, and tearing them apart?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>What if we don’t live forever? Most people don’t like to think about death. But, death is inevitable. We all have limited time. It’s scary, but it's the only way to really see what matters most, to not take things for granted. And, maybe that’s why Kara agreed to meet with Eliza when Alex requested it. Because no one lives forever and before it’s too late, she wants to see Eliza, at least one more time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara. Are you sure you wanna do this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara nods but Lena doesn’t feel reassured. The blonde has been in auto-pilot since Alex came to their home the other day. It’s like she had turned off, which gives Lena another reason to hate Alex. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Darling. I know you have a big heart but you shouldn’t feel forced to meet the Danvers. If you want I can talk to them and ask them to leave you alone”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah, Lena would be more than happy to kick them out of their lives. She has always felt uneasy when there’s family in the mix. And, while the Danvers are not linked by blood to Kara, they are considered family for the pregnant woman. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, Lena. It’s okay. I can deal with it...”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But, Kara. We don’t do well with mothers! Or, family in general, we don’t need them, we have each other, that is enough, right?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s more than enough, Kara reassures her. Lena smiles but still feels compelled to avoid this meeting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is causing you stress, it’s not good for you or the baby. We should cancel the meeting”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The brunette is convinced that letting the Danvers come to have dinner with them will end in a disaster, and she wasn’t completely wrong. Especially when an unexpected guest arrives for dinner too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena freezes when she opens the door and finds Lillian. She was getting ready to look strong and powerful in front of the Danvers but all that armor vanishes the moment Lillian meets her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you not letting me in, Lena. Where are your manners?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena gulps hard, she wasn’t sure if letting her mother in tonight was the best idea of them all, but, it’s not like if she had a choice. Lillian makes herself feel like home and when she does it, the first thing she notices it’s the pregnant woman who’s settling the table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara stiffs when she finally meets with Lena’s mother. She has seen her in pictures, she has seen her on TV, but, in person, she’s more imposing. Lex always joked about how terrifying his mother was, Kara always thought it was a joke but now that she gets the chance to meet her in person, she realizes it wasn’t a joke at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are…?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara. My name is Kara”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde closes the gap between them when she goes for a hug instead of a simple shake of hands. Now, it’s Lena who looks terrified to death. Lillian doesn’t like human touch, it’s like she was allergic to it. So, she can just imagine what she will do to Kara because the pregnant woman dared to touch her without notice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s in that precise moment that the Danvers finally arrive and for the first time in her life, Lena is happy to see Alex again. Lillian hates nothing more than making a scene in public. Maybe that’s why Lillian doesn’t do anything against Kara. The blonde breaks the hug when she hears the sweet voice of the oldest Danvers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“OMG! Kara!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Eliza!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara looks happy but mostly shy in front of the woman who is like a mother to her. The encounter is less than ideal but it’s more than what Eliza could ask for. The old woman rushes to hold Kara between her arms, tears are shared, so many emotions, something with which Lillian as well as Lena don't feel comfortable. Maybe that's why Lilian decides to leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have guests. I should leave then”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena nods and deeply exhales, feeling a big relief because Lillian prefers to leave rather than asking her to kick them out so they can talk. The raven-haired woman was more than happy to escort her mother to the door when…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait! Ms. Luthor! You came to see Lena. You should stay for dinner as well”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?! Kara, no!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian would prefer to leave, she has no intention to socialize with the Danvers but a big smirk appears on her face when she sees the shock on Lena’s face with such a proposition. Getting under the skin of Lena, it’s her speciality, maybe that’s why she accepts Kara’s invitation to stay. The guests start to sit while the two girls are in the kitchen, serving the dishes for the guests.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Lord. Please help us”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Relax Lena. There’s plenty of food”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The quantity of food is not the problem, the brunette wishes the other woman could see that. Lena is internally freaking out. She wasn’t ready to deal with the Danvers and she was definitely not ready to deal with her mother too. Maybe that’s why from the moment they sit to eat, Lena hears in her mind the constant ‘tick tack’ sound, expecting to watch when this dinner will just boom like a bomb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No wine on the table?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian frowns when Kara offers just water or lemonade to fill her glass.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I brought wine!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex feels like the saver of the dinner when she shows the bottle of wine she brought but before the bottle could touch the table, Lena takes it away, asking her to keep it to herself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara doesn’t like alcohol in the house. Everyone at this table should respect that…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde smiles and Alex gulps hard, she understands the aberration against any liquor due to the past of Kara’s parents and gets angry to realize how Lena takes better care of Kara than herself when they were younger. If someone is keeping score on who's better to take care of the blonde, Lena is winning, and that is another reason why Alex doesn’t like Lena at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The abstinence of liquor from Lena’s behalf is something Lillian finds hard to believe, nevertheless she says nothing about it and just quietly observes them. For what she can see, this is the first time someone has such an influence on her daughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The dinner continues its course, no deep chat besides the constant questions Eliza has for Kara. Do you keep liking to read? Have you been eating well? The old woman is trying to fill the blanks on the time gap they were apart, sadly Kara is not ready to employ more words than ‘Yes’ &amp; ‘No’ this evening. Eliza tries to not take it to the heart, but it's painful to see that Kara is not opening up to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s when the dessert is served when the notorious subject in the room is finally  approached.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara, about your pregnancy, it’s… uhmmm… are you two… ahmm...”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s funny to watch that Eliza stammers her words just as much as Kara when she’s nervous. Lena wonders if Kara got it from her, but that's not the matter here. The issue is that they haven’t really talked about their future besides the fact they want to be there for the baby. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena wonders why her mother is so quiet about it, she hasn't said anything about Kara and Lena wants to know what is happening inside Lillian’s mind but the young Luthor cannot focus on finding it out as Eliza doesn’t stop to make questions about the baby.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you know the sex of the baby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you use more words than ‘yes’ &amp; ‘no’?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena rolls her eyes while Kara pouts like a kid when Eliza points out their lack of response. The interrogation seemed to end when Lillian finally speaks to ask just one question.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you together?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena and Kara look at each other, they get red of blush. And, this is the question they don’t dare to answer with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ because they don’t know. They live together, they will have the baby together. They feel something for each other even if neither of them have said a word about it. They know there’s something there, so, are they together? Or, they want to be together as a couple? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The CEO has no idea of what to say. The idea of being a parent is a reality even if they haven’t decided the details about it but, what about Kara? Will they always be together? Will they be something more than parents? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena takes a moment to think, she has no idea how to define what is and will be her relationship with the blonde but, closing her eyes, wondering what future holds for her, all she see is Kara with their kid, feeding it, holding it; it brings such joy to Lena’s heart that she decides to not worry about it and she allows herself a moment to dream about Kara &amp; the baby, dismissing whatever is happening around her till Alex decides to change the topic of conversation when she makes a statement that takes everyone by surprise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara, we would like you to have the baby in Midvale”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“WHAT?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom is a doctor, I’m a doctor, we can be there for you all the time and I’ve already started to change the studio of Dad into a nursery”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena and Kara are shocked by the proposition, Eliza looks shy but it’s obvious she’s supporting Alex’s idea. Lillian doesn’t say a word, she just takes a sip of her lemonade, wishing it was liquor so this drama would be less annoying.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re better off away from the Luthors, Kara. Please, just come back home with us”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex looks at Lena into the eyes, this is a declaration of war and Lena wants to rip off her head right now for her insolence but before the dear Luthor could say a word, someone else has something to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m staying with Lena. And, if you don’t like that. You should leave now, Alex”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eliza gulps hard, Kara shows no seconds thought as she requests them to get their things and leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We should leave, Alex”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? No! Mom! We cannot leave Kara with her! She…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eliza looks at Alex, telling her with the eyes to not say a word of what they know about the Luthor’s family. The last thing she wants, it’s to cause more damage to Kara, she really believes it’s not the moment nor the place to reveal some truths but she doesn’t know they are not the only ones who know the links of the past that join them. Lillian puts down her glass and starts to talk when she realizes no one has the guts to address the elephant in the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara, did you know that your father worked for us?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Jeremiah?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, yes. But, I’m also talking about your biological father. Both of them worked for a project founded by Luthor-Corp”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde looks confused, she has no idea of what is happening but something in her heart tells her she’s not ready to hear this. Alex &amp; Eliza look at each other, fearing the worst as Lillian gets ready to talk about the past. And Lena just wonders what underhand plans has her mother in mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother, what are you scheming?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m scheming nothing, Lena. Unlike your other guests, I’m not the kind of person who likes to beat around the bush”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian turns her look towards the other old woman, making clear that if she’s not willing to talk what she knows, she will. Eliza gulps hard, she’s still not willing to reveal anything, she just hopes that Lillian will have some tact to deliver the news. Something Lillian doesn’t have at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know if you remember, Lena but the ambition of your father was insatiable. He was always the kind of person to push and push without considering the limitations of the others”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena remembers, she recalls how many hours she spent riding horses so she could make his father proud. Winning the gold in a competition should have been enough, but it wasn’t for Lionel. Competition after competition, Lena had to win them all, she had to practice for that and she did, non-stop till she broke… she broke her ankle when she was too tired to control the horse. Big disappointment, that’what Lionel said, and that’s when Lena understood that no matter what she would do, it would never be enough for her father. And, while Lena recalls how her father was, her mother continues talking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mr. Danvers decided to quit the project when he started to feel the constant pressure of Lionel. Maybe if your father would have done the same, Kara. He would still be here around us”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara as well as Lena gulp hard, scared to find out the meaning of those words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“After Jeremiah left the project, all the pressure to lead the project went to your father, Kara. He couldn’t stand to the high standards of my husband and it broke his spirit”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leave it to a Luthor to crush people without laying a finger on them. Lena can just imagine the abusive behavior of her father with his workers. More than once, there were rumors that the pressure in the work was so high that many people decided to quit their own lives. Of course, the company never took responsibility for it, RH and the big board of lawyers were too clever to always find a way to link such deaths with a personal issue.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“From what I know, Kara, your father started to use alcohol to manage the stress. And, that was just the beginning of the end…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara gulps hard, feeling sad about the circumstances her father had to bear. Trying to hold on to a secure position, in one of the biggest companies in the world, it was a dream he wasn’t ready to quit. So, each time the pressure was too high, when he had no energy to stay awake and keep working, he would find relief in a glass of whiskey. With time, one glass became two, then three and before knowing it, he was no longer able to function without liquor running into his veins. It’s sad, but it's the reality of so many people who use drugs, liquor for their day-to-day work.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one says a word till Alex gets up, upset, ready to share some words with Lillian. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You pushed Kara’s father to kill himself! Just like you pushed my father to the death too!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alex! Calm down!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Eliza tries to be the voice of reason but Alex is too emotional to pay attention to her mother’s words. She angrily looks at Lilian, waiting to hear her reply to the accusation. And to her surprise, Lillian replies very calmly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can understand why you believe it is our fault for the heart attack of your father, Miss Danvers. But, just because my husband had a phone call with him before he died, it doesn’t mean we kill him…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re monsters!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Being powerful and untouchable doesn’t make us monsters, Miss Danvers. Jeremiah had a call with Lionel. I don’t know the details about that call beside the fact that Mr. Danvers had a change of heart and decided to speak out about the abusive behavior of Lionel as a boss…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara wonders if that change of heart was caused by their talk on the lack. Big part, it was, but, it was also his conscience that was constantly telling him to do something about it. That day when Jeremiah died, after his talk with Kara, he realized that taking care of Kara wasn’t enough. More people could end like Kara’s father if he didn’t speak out, and, that’s why he decided to confront his ex-boss about it, once and for all.  Sadly, his heart wasn’t strong enough to deal with it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My husband had a strong argument with Mr. Danvers on the phone. And, if Jeremiah's heart wasn’t strong enough to deal with my husband’s threats when he tried to make the buzz about the destructive behavior of Lionel. Then, the only one responsible for his death is himself…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex screams in a moment of rage. Contrary to the young Danvers, Lillian shows no emotion at all about what she’s saying. It’s like if it doesn’t affect her at all and Lena gets sick to her stomach, because she was just like that before Kara came to her life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How many employees quit because the workload was too much? How many times she heard about the burn out increasing in the company and she didn’t care at all? Lena was more human than her parents, but she was still very insensitive to the limitations of others. Programmed to always be the best of the best, like her father, she was used to pushing people to their limits, thinking it was the best for them even if it wasn’t always the case.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thinking about it, Lena also relied on the liquor to deal with things. Now, she wonders if she has led others to the same path than Kara’s father. Her mind goes crazy and Kara sees it, she sees fear and regrets reflected in those beautiful green eyes but when she tries to touch Lena and give her any kind of comfort, the dear Lena does what she does the best when she feels a turmoil of emotions, she walks away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena? Where are you going?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The brunette doesn’t reply, she just leaves without turning back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What if we don’t live forever it’s no longer the question that hunts them the most, what if they cannot get past the error of their parents is the question now. What's going to happen if they can no longer live happily together? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Being a Luthor has always been a burden, but now, it’s more than that, now, it feels like a curse, a guilt that Lena is not sure if she could ever feel free to share with Kara at all.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Cat Grant, so nice of you to receive me in such a short notice…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Queen of all the media doesn’t say a word, she just laughs at the words of the old Luthor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, I’m not nice…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re nicer than me”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anyone is nicer than you”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian smirks, taking the comment as a compliment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What brings you here, Lillian?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Always to the point, you never change”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And, you’re not the kind of person who requests a meeting without a reason. So, what brings you here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m looking for my daughter, Lena. She walked away from me during dinner a few days ago and it seems that no one has seen her since then…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat makes no comment about it, she just takes a sip of her glass as she watches Lilian’s posture. The iron woman doesn’t look so indestructible now that Lena is missing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s this linked to what you asked me to look into, a few weeks ago?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian recalls their previous meetings, the reason why she flew back to town was because Cat told her she got the information she requested. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You looked at me with fear that night”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian recalls the welcome she got from Cat that night when she stepped into her office. Being feared has always brought pride to herself till now, Lillian thinks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wasn’t afraid of you, Lillian. I was scared to acknowledge that I’m not very different from Lionel”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not the easiest boss either. I’m also an expert when it comes to hurting people with nothing more than words and ink. Pushing my staff to do the impossible and request the imaginable has always been something that made me proud till…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Till you realized that your staff are more than assets. That they are more fragile than what you believe. That your words can hit harder than a fist and that you have the power to destroy lives with a simple snap of your fingers…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat gulps hard and Lillian smirks at how shocked she looks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The goal of making you look into the past was never to make you reflect on your behavior as a boss. But, if it happened in between, I guess, it’s a collateral damage I can live with…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat and Lillian smile at each other, and the Queen of media laughs when Lillian thinks that she owes her another favor if she’s helping her to be a better person.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You ask too much, Lillian! Asking me to personally look into the accident of your son and the past of that poor girl, Kiera wasn’t enough?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Her name is Kara…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat rolls her eyes, getting the correct name seems irrelevant right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After Lex's death, Lillian used all her connections to find out if it was more than a simple accident. It wouldn’t be the first time that someone tried to kill a Luthor. And, she will not say it out loud but she needed to find any conspiracy behind the death of her dear Lex or, the grief would eat her alive. Lillian needed to blame someone, she needed to put in someone else all her pain, her sorrow, her frustration but to her shock, the accident was nothing more than an accident due to an animal that crossed the road at that time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Since when Lex was protector of the animals? Lillian is sure that she instilled in her children the notion of always putting their life ahead of anything! So, it’s hard to believe for her that one of her kids died just because he couldn’t put his life as a priority, no, he decided that protecting the life of a damn animal was more important, and it makes Lillian sick to think about the real reason behind the death of Lex.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>If Lex was enough stupid to put his life at risk for an animal, then, he definitely was stupid enough to choose the mother of his kid. That’s what Lillian thinks and that is the reason why she asked Cat to look deeply into Kara’s past, she needed to find who was this Kara Danvers, the woman who was carrying her grandchild. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I normally don’t do this kind of work, but, since it was for you, I did it…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You owed me a favor and that’s why you played to be a journalist looking for the truth…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat smirks at Lillian’s comment, it’s true that she digged into Kara’s past because she wanted to pay a debt, but, to be honest, she enjoyed it more than what she was expecting. Looking into documents, interviewing people, and making the research, it brought her back to her old days when she was nothing more than a newbie reporter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You remembered why I chose this profession. Thank you for that…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It sounds like you owe me another favor, then…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cat laughs, it seems she will never get her bill settled with the old Luthor.  And, while this mother is using her connexions to find Lena. The others have to do the best they can with what they have. That’s why, across town, Kara and Alex are looking for Lena on the streets.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena! Lena! Where are you? Lena!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really, Kara? She’s not a dog, you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde ignores the sarcastic comment of Alex and continues to yell the name of the girl she dies to see again. Walking around the streets, calling to hospitals, it’s the only thing that Kara gets to do in order to find her dear Luthor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll call her again”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s the 50th or the 80th she does it? They have lost count of how many calls, how many texts they have sent to Lena, but when the blonde realizes that the voicemail is full, she realizes too that she has arrived to her limit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This is why she doesn’t let people in. This is the reason why she was a runaway, because it hurt less to leave than to be abandoned. And, Kara blames no one than herself for feeling like this, but, it’s too late to do something about it. She has opened up to Lena, she cares for her, she has let her in and that’s why she stares at her phone, begging God to bring Lena back to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It breaks Alex to see how Kara stares at her phone, wondering if the other girl will call at any second. If Alex wasn't a fan of Lena, she hates her even more now, for how she’s making Kara feel. And, to be honest, she’s not the only one who hates Lena right now. Lena hates herself too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yeah, the raven-haired woman hates herself so much that she’s drinking her problems without caring about how this could affect her health. Drink after drink, Lena is lost in a plush bar.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure you want another drink?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The bartender hesitates to keep serving more liquor. Lena doesn’t reply, she just puts 50$ in the pocket of the barman and the man understands he just needs to shut his mouth and fill the glass of the woman again.  It’s not a fancy bar, lots of immigrants and people from many places are here. She’s sure no one will find her here till the last person she wanted to see appears at the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh! For Lord’s sake, mother! You’re worse than the plague! I cannot get rid of you, isn't it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Language, Lena! You may be hiding in a dump but regardless of where you’re, you should always show manners…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena rolls her eyes when her mother scolds her with the etiquette standards. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How did you find me, mother?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian doesn’t reply, she will never admit she had to ask for help from someone like Cat Grant to find her own daughter, and even if she’s not sure how Cat got the correct address of where Lena was, she’s glad she found the raven-haired woman before she passed out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t belong here, Lena. Let’s go…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Where should I go?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“To your home…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena sadly chuckles under the thought of going home. Home is Kara and she cannot be with Kara if it’s her family’s fault all the bad that happened in Kara’s past. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I cannot go home…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because… because…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena doesn’t finish her sentences, she just burst into tears and Lillian rolls her eyes, she hates to deal with emotional breakdowns and to be honest, she was hoping that her daughter would be stronger than this. After all, she built her to be unbreakable. But, there’s nothing which cannot break in this world, everything has its breaking point and for Lena, this is it, the truth of what comes with being a Luthor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Back to the apartment, Kara was with Alex when the door opens and the blonde smiles because she sees again...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara brightly smiles when she sees Lillian’s driver carrying an unconscious Lena to the bedroom. The blonde makes no comment about how drunk she’s, the pregnant woman is just happy to have Lena back. Lillian makes no comment about how happy Kara is, she just says...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She will need some aspirins in the morning. I’ll take care of the company for the moment. Let her know I’m not happy with her behavior…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde nods and she hugs Lillian again, this time tighter as she cannot stop saying ‘thanks’ to the old woman because she brought home her dear Lena. Lillan is unfamiliar with the touching need of the blonde to always hug. She makes no comment about and just leaves without saying another word. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now that Lena is home, Kara is happy again and Alex cannot understand why. Why does this woman mean so much to Kara? Why the Luthor is Kara’s home? Alex doesn’t think she can hold it anymore, the question for which one she knows already the answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You love her, don’t you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, Kara! Don’t lie to me! And, mostly don’t lie to yourself!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was like a bucket of cold water what hit her when Alex insisted that she needed to acknowledge her feelings. More than once, she asked Alex to drop the subject but acting like a big sister, Alex refused to drop it till Kara badly snapped against her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whatever I feel or not, it’s not your damn business, Alex!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s my business because you’re my little sister, Kara.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I’m not!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex gulps hard when Kara denies any relationship between them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara, I…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You never wanted a sister. You got stuck with me for a while and that’s it. You’re not my sister, you never were, you never will be…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex gets a knot in her throat. She’s out of words, especially when Kara opens the door for her and asks her to leave and never come back again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you were expecting when we met again on Ruby’s birthday, Alex. But, I don’t need your bad energy around me, okay!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not a bad vibe, Kara! I’m just worried about you! I know I screwed up big time when we were younger. But, I’m not that child anymore. I’m here and this time I want to be a real sister for you”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then stop constantly telling me that I shouldn’t be with Lena when she’s the only that really matters for me in this world!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde is speaking from the heart and tears roll over her eyes as she clearly stated her only request towards the brunette.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why is she so important to you, Kara?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because Lena is my home, Alex. You already left me without a home once. Please, don’t do it again…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alex deeply sighs, looking down she has no intention to cause more pain to Kara so she just leaves for now, without saying another word. After closing the door, Kara feels like she can breathe again. Dragging her tired body to the bedroom, she hesitates to get closer to Lena when she smells the liquor emanating from the sleeping CEO. Nevertheless, her desire to feel close to Lena is stronger than any mixing feeling she might have against the alcohol. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Trying to hold her breath, Kara curls besides Lena, and just like her, she’s falling asleep when she mumbles…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, do not become a monster too, Lena…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kara knows how alcohol can transform good people into monsters when they rely on it. She really wishes Lena doesn’t end like her father, that’s why she falls asleep, praying for Lena’s soul. And, to be honest, she’s not the only one who’s scared of becoming a monster. Maybe that’s why the next morning when Kara wakes up, she finds the CEO deep thinking in the kitchen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena! You’re awake!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The raven-haired woman nods, her head is still spinning but she’s sober enough to know what she needs to do next.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara. We need to talk”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the end, all that matters, it’s not to know if we can live forever or not, it’s to know if we’re able to make happy those we cherish the most. Believing we’re good, we’re fighters it’s harder of what it looks like. And, maybe that’s why Lena is getting ready to quit any dream before daring to really fight for it. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>What if we don’t live forever? What do we do with the time we have? What do we do to make the most of our days on Earth? If you ask Lena right now what she does with her time, the answer is simple: Work. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Miss. Luthor, the board arrived for the meeting”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good to know Jess. I’ll need to travel to the South later today to finally close this deal I’ve with Andrea Rojas. Can you please make sure my jet is ready  to fly when my meeting ends? Asks my driver to get my bags from my home, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her assistant nods, they keep talking about work. Lena signs documents while she gives precise instructions on what to do while she’s gone. Everything seems like always, like if she had just pushed a reset in her life and all this like it was before…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kara Danvers…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Miss Danvers called again…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena says nothing, she just waves her hand to Jess, asking her to leave her alone. Her assistant knows better than this that the name of Kara Danvers shouldn’t be pronounced but she feels bad for the girl who’s constantly trying to reach her boss.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Miss. Luthor, maybe you could give her a call someday?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve nothing to say to her, everything I had to say, I already said it…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She knows it’s not true, she knows they have plenty of things to discuss, but, just recalling their last conversation, Lena doesn’t feel strong enough to deal with any emotion at all…</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What do you want to talk about, Lena?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Kara was thinking that they could talk about how they feel after what was said during the dinner they had with their relatives. But, Lena is not the kind of person who likes to analyze what is happening in her head even less what is happening in her heart. And, that’s why she requests Kara to leave the house.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You want me to leave?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lena looks down at the coffee she just made, she cannot deal with the sad, puppy eyes the other woman is making right now. She needs to be rational concerning the decision she’s making.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I have other properties, you can move in whatever you like. Or, if you find another apartment of your like, I can pay for it. Whatever you decide, it will be fine for me…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s not fine, it’s not fine at all to not see Kara everyday as she wakes up, but she shuts down those feelings as she starts to drink her coffee.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“And, what if I want to stay here, with you?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lena spit out her coffee over the kitchen table when she hears what Kara wants. She wants to smile because it makes her happy to see that she wants to be with her but, she refuses to believe that is an option at all.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m sorry, Kara. But, living together is not possible anymore…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Why?! This is my home, Lena! You’re my home!”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lena wants to cry as Kara holds her from the collar of her blouse, looking at her in the eyes, begging her to let her stay at her side. And, God knows Lena would love to be able to do that, but she can’t because…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re a constant reminder of all the bad things my family has done…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Lena…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I cannot look at you without feeling sick of who I am and where I come from…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The blonde gulps hard, the last thing she wants it’s to make Lena’s life harder.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I don’t blame you for anything. You know that, right?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lena nods but she finds it hard to believe that Kara doesn’t hold any grudge against her. After all, it was her father who caused so much damage to Kara’s family. It’s running on her veins, the blood of the real monster in Kara's tale. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So, what are we going to do now, Lena? What will we do about the baby?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The blonde hugs her big belly, she’s entering her last months of her pregnancy and, the idea of going through all of that without Lena at her side, it breaks her heart more than what she ever imagined. The pregnant woman starts to cry and Lena wishes she would be brave enough to hold her one more time, but she's not. And, that’s why she takes her keys and leaves the house with no intention to turn back as she says:</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“This is for the best, Kara”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She cannot stop wondering if she was right and if the decision she took is really for the best. Lost on her thoughts, Lena spaces out till someone brings her back to reality.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Miss. Luthor…? Miss. Luthor… Miss. Luthor!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmmm?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your meeting is starting without you. You spaced out for a moment but, you should go…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right. Yes! I’ll go to the conference room in a moment…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jess nods, she walks to the door, ready to leave, but, before crossing the door, she asks once again what she should do if Miss. Danvers calls again. Like every time, the reply of Lena is the same, send her a big check, the CEO says. Jess deeply sighs, she hates the order but she’s compelling to do it no matter what.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like the professional person she’s. Lena does her work flawlessly even if deep down, she’s a complete mess because each day, she craves more and more for the presence of Kara in her life. It doesn’t help that Sam is also gone from her life. Since she fired her that day she brought Alex to her home, they haven’t talked at all. She has lost too, her best friend, her confidant. Yeah, Lena has pushed everyone away, the only left it’s work. That’s good, that’s enough, it’s what Lena always says to herself even if she doesn’t believe it at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she finally gets down from her plane, her new partner in business was already waiting for her at the airport. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena! You arrived!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena is surprised to see her old friend too, but, she’s more surprised to notice that the spoiled brat known as Andrea Rojas is right now a…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom?! You’re a mom?! Since when?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Andrea shrugs, she introduces her daughter of 2 years to the dear Luthor and they drive home. From the airport to the moment of the dinner, the kid of Andrea seems to be very fond of Lena.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look at you, Lena. Who would have thought you were so good with kids.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena sadly chuckles, she might be good with kids but, it kills her to know she might never be good enough for her own kid. There’s no doubt Kara will be an amazing mother. That will be enough for the kid, right? Once again, the brunette gets lost on her thought till her new partner on business makes a question the CEO wasn’t expecting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s true, the rumor I heard?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What rumor?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That you’re finally settling down”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena takes it as a joke, putting into little boxes all the feelings she’s feeling about it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, it’s not true?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know me, Andrea. I’m married to my work. There’s no room for more”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know, Lena. I also thought the same for several years. But, then, I found someone different, someone who brought me out of my selfish behavior and gave me reasons to long for something more than a luxurious life”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The new heir of the empire Rojas explains how she met her husband, how they got pregnant without planning it and how welcoming their daughter to the world has been the biggest accomplishment she could ever make. It makes Lena smile to find a new Andrea, a more human woman than the brat she was when they were in college.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You should consider the idea of being a mom, Lena. You would excel in it as everything you do. Believe me, being a mom, it changes you for the better…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe I don’t want to change…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe you just haven’t found the good reason to…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena sadly chuckles because she found her reason to change, to be better,  and she cannot be with that reason. That night the brunette allows herself to fantasize about the idea of having the same that Andrea has. A big house with a big backyard, a dog running around as Kara plays with their child as they wait for Lena’s arrival and then, the complete bliss when she finally gets home, to the warmth of Kara and their baby.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, Kara…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She calls her name at night, she calls her under her sleep and she cries every night that she passes without having her at her side. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The grey days are back and Lena passes the next couple of days, working on the new project she has with Andrea as she is longing for Kara. The launch of the product finally comes and Lena has to fake happiness about it. Because without Kara, the brunette is unable to feel happiness at all. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The big day is here, Lena! The launch of our product!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, and, you’re not coming to the gala of the launch”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Andrea giggles and once again she apologizes for missing the party. To be honest, Lena is more shocked to realize that Andrea is capable of saying ‘no’ to any party. But, when it’s about choosing between going to the gala or staying at home to finish the halloween costume of her daughter, there was no choice to make in Andrea’s mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They keep the chat on the phone while Lena gets ready for the gala. It’s when she discusses some details about the project with Andrea when she realizes she forgot her speech in her office. Looking at the clock, she has plenty of time to go to the office and make it to the party in time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a saturday night and she expects to find no one at this hour in her office. Especially since she made new regulations on the working hours. No one has to do more than 7h per day. A new space of meditation and yoga was settled in her building. She even hired some therapists so the employees can talk with someone if they feel the need to do it. Yeah, she’s trying to change, she’s trying to do better. But, in the eyes of the person who’s right now in her office, it’s not enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother. What are you doing here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian doesn’t reply, she’s sitting in Lena’s chair as she looks at the astonishing woman she raised, looking impeccable in front of the eyes of everyone but she knows her child too well to know that behind that perfect image, there’s a broken girl who’s on the verge of a breakdown.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just read your speech for tonight’s gala. What a disappointment, I must say…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena moves her jaw, she expects not less of her mother to choose the worst moment to make her feel bad about herself. But, if a fight it’s what Lillian is looking for, that’s what she will get because the brunette has more than one thing to say to the one person who gave birth to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I might look like a disappointment to you, but you're more than a disappointment to me as a mother!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This is the first time Lena speaks to her like this. Normally, she would scold her to even raise her voice but she's intrigued to hear what the CEO has to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are an awful mother!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YES!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And, do you dare to tell me why I’m such an awful mother?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena gulps hard, hesitating for a brief moment if it would be wise to finally speak her mind or just walk away. But at this moment in her life, she has nothing to lose. After all, she already lost the one thing she cared the most when she kicked Kara out of her life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re… you’re… you’re not the nicest person in this world!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian mocks, if this is the worst insult Lena can give her, then she really messed it up, badly. Lena angrily pouts, she wants Lilliant to take this seriously and that’s why she makes a list, a very detailed list of all the reproaches she has against her, like: not letting her go to the social events where Lex had to show his best manners. Everytime the family went out to any event, she always felt like an outcast for not going.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were a child, Lena. Why would you ever want to assist such boring events?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because I’m a Luthor! Because it was my birth right! But, somehow you always pushed me aside. Just your precious Lex had the right to pose for the news”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian rolls her eyes and it just pisses off Lena even more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing I do is enough for you!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why do you think that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why?! I mean it’s obvious! From the moment I stepped in as the CEO of this company, you have done nothing else than making my life miserable!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And, why do you think I’m doing such a thing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena shrugs, she wants to say that Lillian just likes to be evil and bring hell to others. But, she stays in silence as she expects to hear whatever Lillian has to say to explain her actions. The raven-haired woman was ready to hear any sarcastic reply from her mother, anything vicious. Anything except the tremendous truth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t see things the same way, Lena. What you consider as a neglect act from my behalf. I see it as an act of protection”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena frowns, she has no idea what Lillian means, and her confused face just confirms what her mother said. They don’t have the same perspective of things.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Speak as people tell you. Act as people tell you. Do what others say without questioning why. That’s how I was educated. And, that’s why I refused to let you suffer the same brainwashing!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were never supposed to be a doll and look pretty in socal events, Lena. You were more than that. You were… you are more than that, my child. So, excuse me if I prefered to leave you at home. Playing with your toys, living like any child should live, in its fantasy world instead of going to boring meetings where adults try to play along so they can get benefits from each other”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena drops her mouth open, she has no words to say. Especially when Lillian starts to say her version of all the detailed list of reproaches. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I never planned to drag you to our world, Lena. Someone had to live with the burden of being a Luthor. To fulfill the obligations that come with our name. And, I decided to put that burden in your brother’ shoulders”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian deeply sighs, she knows that putting such pressure on her little boy wasn’t fair either but, between Lex &amp; Lena, she decided to give to her only daughter the freedom she never had. That’s the main reason she got so angry when Lex back out without considering the consequences of his actions. Of what would mean for Lena.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your private instructors gave you the same lessons that any other girl from our position would have received. But, besides that, you were always free to choose what to do with your free time”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Equestrianism, the courses of astrology, the linguistic courses. All the extracurricular activities were always her choices, Lena’s choices. She might have made some choices to please her father, but, now that she thinks about it, Lillian never put limitations on her education neither on the choices she made for her own future till she became the CEO of the company.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lena. You were supposed to follow your own path. Yours! Not the one others choose for you! So, Yes! I’m disappointed! I’m angry! Because being the head of the company of your father was never your dream! And, I don’t approve, you walk away from your dreams!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena gulps hard, she doesn’t know what to say. All these years, she always thought that Lillian didn’t care at all about her when on the contrary, all she has done it’s for her well-being. Yes, Lillian might not be the most loving mother, but she did till the impossible to make sure Lena would be free to do whatever she wanted to do in life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fighting against Lionel, against the board, against even YOU! For the freedom I never had, it’s the last thing I could do as a mother. All I ever wanted it’s to give you the freedom to become your own person. Not a Luthor, YOU, Lena. You were supposed to become something else and built your path away from the Luthor’s name” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what to say…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lillian deeply sighs, she doesn’t expect Lena to understand her actions as a mother. She just hopes Lena could open her eyes and realizes that she’s more than a simple CEO. The old woman walks toward the door, she cannot stand to watch how Lena is not able to fight for her own destiny because reading the cards of her speech, all she hears it’s the empty words of an empty spirit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make it to the gala. I’m done looking at the doll you’ve become…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mother…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Her due date is around the corner, Lena. Your child, because it’s yours, it’s going to be born at any second. And, where are you? Here, getting ready to play the role your father always wished for you…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know about Kara and the origins of the baby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you &amp; Lex really believe you could hide such a thing from me? Please, I’ve known everything from the beginning, even the reason why you look at her like she was the most precious thing in this world.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you're talking about. There’s nothing between Kara and me”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Keep telling yourself that. But, you love her even if you’re incapable of admitting it”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena gulps hard, trying to control the tears which are trying to fall from her beautiful eyes. She was sure she could keep it together but when Lillian stands at her side and softly kisses her front-head with so much tenderness, with all the love she has for her, Lena’s tears can’t be held any more, they fall as a waterfall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t act the way I did because I didn’t love you, Lena. I love you, and it’s because I love you that I really want you to choose your own path. Choose to follow your dreams. Choose to be happy. Choose to be loved, Lena…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mom…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lena is crying, she cannot say a word to express all she’s feeling right now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your future is not this office, Lena. It never was and I hope you soon realize that…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>We don’t live forever, but we live enough to build our own path. The question is, what will Lena choose for her future? What is the path she will consider as hers?</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Kara…”</p><p>“Mhmmm…”</p><p>“Kara, wake up. Breakfast is served”</p><p>“One more minute, Lena…”</p><p>“I’m not Lena…”</p><p>The pregnant woman wildly opens her eyes when she realizes that once again she called Alex, Lena. Her sister doesn’t take it badly, to be honest, she’s just happy to have Kara in the house again. </p><p>“When you feel ready, there are pancakes for you on the table”</p><p>The blonde smiles, stretching over the bed under the thought of eating delicious pancakes. She gets ready to stand off the bed when she realizes that Alex is not going to have breakfast with her.</p><p>“Where are you going?”</p><p>“Sam and Ruby are finally arriving today. I promised them to see them at the train station”</p><p>Kara smiles when she sees how happy Alex looks when the name of Sam is mentioned. The idea of seeing Sam and Ruby makes her happy too, but, sad also because somehow, thinking about them, it makes her think about Lena. She left the city, trying to bring some peace to her mind. She wasn’t sure if going back to Midvale was  the best idea but when she stopped to live with Lena, she started to reconnect with the Danvers.</p><p>They say that when a door closes, another gets open. And, maybe that’s what happened to her. Lena’s door got closed to her, but the one of the Danvers got open again. Taking it as a sigh of fate, Kara decided to accept the proposition and live with the Danvers. </p><p>Kara was happy to be back, Eliza was thrilled with the idea of having her girl home again. From cookies to sweet pies and the most fluffy pancakes that Kara has ever tasted. Eliza was doing all that was possible to make her happy. And yes, sweet things make her happy, but no matter how many sweet things she could eat, she didn’t feel completely happy.</p><p>“Kara, sweety. You’re spacing out again and your pancakes will get cold…”</p><p>“Oh, yeah! Right!”</p><p>Eliza smiles when she sees her devouring the plate of pancakes but the old woman can’t stop wondering why there’s so much sadness in Kara's eyes. </p><p>“You’ve stopped calling at L-Corp…”</p><p>Kara nods, filling her mouth with food.</p><p>“You’re giving up on talking with her?”</p><p>“I think it’s clear that she doesn’t want to have any contact with me. I should respect her wishes…”</p><p>“And, what about the baby?”</p><p>“She has made it very clear that she will provide me with everything we might need, so, it’s gonna be okay…”</p><p>It’s not okay, a child needs more than a comfortable life. He needs love, he needs parents watching over him. And, she would like to have a bigger talk with Kara about it, but she decides to drop it when she sees how sad Kara looks when the name of Lena is mentioned.</p><p>Without the CFO position at L-Corp. Alex proposed to Sam &amp; Ruby to move to Midvale. Sam is not sure if it’s a good idea but when Alex shows her a diamond ring, she realizes that Alex is being serious about her. And, somehow the ex CFO finds no reason to say no.</p><p>“Alex asked my help with the move. It’s okay if I let you alone for a couple of hours?”</p><p>Kara nods, she can’t believe that Alex quit her job in the city so she could stay close to her and Eliza. Following the family tradition, Alex became a doctor, that’s how she met Sam. One day in the ER, there was an hysterical mother who was going to murder any intern if her daugther wouldn’t be take care immediately and that was for Alex, love at first sight. All the personnel of the hospital found the brunette irrational and crazy while Alex couldn’t stop thinking what dedicated mother she was.</p><p>“They will be our new neighbors, I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing, Eliza…”</p><p>“Well, I just know that I’ll not hesitate to drop the cops to their house if Alex keeps hearing that noisy music she likes…”</p><p>Eliza chuckles after saying that, she loves Alex, but she never liked her taste in music. The days pass by and Kara starts to like more and more her new normal. Having Sam close it becomes something wonderful for the blonde. It’s always nice to share some thoughts with another woman who went through the same as hers.</p><p>“You’re completely right, Kara! The swelling of the feet, it’s unbearable!”</p><p>“You see, Alex! I’m not crazy!”</p><p>“I never said you were crazy. I just said it doesn’t look such a big deal for me…”</p><p>“You say that because you haven’t lived it…”</p><p>“Sam, it’s that your way to tell me you want to see me pregnant?”</p><p>Sam spit out her cocoa and the rest of the family just laughs at her reaction. </p><p>“Relax, Sam. I was just teasing you.”</p><p>“Not funny, Danvers…”</p><p>Alex shrugs and Sam rolls her eyes, how did she accept to marry such a snarky girl? Maybe Alex’s humor is not her best quality but, the dear Danvers has so much to offer. Kara has seen a new side of Alex since Sam and Ruby moved in. Going to all the soccer games of Ruby, baking and cooking for her family, getting the coolest decoration for halloween and the perfect family costume, it’s just a few things that Alex does and Kara likes this homie version of her, it suits her well. </p><p>They keep talking, drinking their cocoa till the night arrives and Alex carries a sleepy Ruby to their house. Sam stays for a moment before saying them good-bye for tonight. </p><p>“I’m sorry you lost your job because of me, Sam”</p><p>“Kara, I told you before, you’ve nothing to apologize for”</p><p>The blonde nods, but she's still wondering if she could have done something to fix it. And the truth is that…</p><p>“To be honest Kara, I felt a big relief when Lena fired me”</p><p>“What?!”</p><p>“As CFO, yeah, the pay was good but the sacrifices were too much too. Honestly, I didn’t quit first because I didn’t want to leave Lena alone…”</p><p>Sam misses her friend, she’s not angry with Lena. She understands why she reacted the way she did, she just hopes they will get the chance to meet again and repair their friendship.</p><p>“Sam, can I ask you something?”</p><p>“Sure”</p><p>“Do you think you’ll ever be able to forgive Lena?”</p><p>Sam smiles and replies there’s nothing to forgive. Kara seems happy with the answer, she’s happy that Lena has such a good friend in Sam. Alex is waiting for her at home, so Sam leaves and Kara waves her hand. The blonde is really happy to see Alex &amp; Sam as a family, but it's also sad to wonder if she will ever have that too. </p><p>“Don’t worry about anything Kara. I’m sure you’ll get a happy family too, one day…”</p><p>Kara chuckles when Eliza says such words. It will never stop to surprise her how well Eliza gets to know what she’s thinking and find the perfect words to make her feel better. She wonders if she will have the same special superpower when her kid is born. Going to bed, thinking about what kind of a mother she will be, Kara closes her eyes and dreams with what would be her perfect family. A tear drops from her sleeping eyes when once again, Lena appears in her dreams. Being the lovely parent, Kara knows she will be one day.</p><p>We have dreams, we have fantasies we never believe will become true, till they do.</p><p>“Trick or treat!”</p><p>“Awww, Ruby you look adorable as a superhero…”</p><p>“I’m Supergirl!”</p><p>Kara chuckles when she sees the sweet kid making the classic pose of her favorite hero. As Ruby is dressed as a hero, Alex looks like a secret agent while Sam has a villain outfit because Alex says it looks good on her.</p><p>“Stop eye-fucking her, Alex! There are kids around!”</p><p>Alex tries to excuse her, but she says that Sam looks super hot as Reign and she cannot stop looking at her the way she does it.</p><p>“Seems like Agent Danvers will need to be taught a lesson later tonight…”</p><p>“Oh, Sam, I love when you talk dirty to me…”</p><p>Kara and Ruby cover their ears and throw them candies because they condemn their behavior. </p><p>“Fine, fine, fine, we will behave! Now, Kara stops eating all the candies and gives us something…”</p><p>The blonde giggles and she gives them some candies she has in a big bowl. Eliza takes some photos of them and when Ruby insists to drag her with them to trick and treat, Kara is left alone.</p><p>“It seems it’s gonna be just you and me tonight, buddy”</p><p>The blonde talks to her belly and deeply exhales when she thinks that from now on, it will always be just the two of them. Alex might be close, but she has her own family and Eliza. Well, Eliza will always be a great mother and Kara has no doubt she will be a great grandma, but, Kara wants more than a cool Aunt and a great grandma for her and her kid. Yes, she wants more that’s what she tells to herself when she hears the knock at the door.</p><p>“If you don’t sing the song of trick and treat, you’ll not get any candy!”</p><p>The blonde is already scolding whoever is knocking at the door without saying a word. With the hand on the door, Kara hesitates on opening it. What if this is a prank? What if when she opens the door, there will be a teenager throwing her eggs or worse, putting a poop bag at the door. If this is a prank, she will be so pissed because right now her hormones are going crazy, and, really, whoever is behind this door, they don’t really want to mess with a hormonal Kara Danvers. </p><p>The ring of the bell sounds again and Kara takes a deep breath before opening the door. To her surprise, when she opens the door, she doesn’t find any kid asking for candies nor any teenager making a prank. The only she gets when she opens the door is…</p><p>“Lena…”</p><p>Yes, Lena Luthor is in Midvale, standing in front of Kara. And, looking at her, the blonde wonders if this is a prank from fate because she was finally making peace with the fact of not having the dear brunette in her life. So, why? WHY?! Lena is here now!</p><p>“You shouldn’t be here, Lena”</p><p>The raven-haired woman gulps hard when Kara says such a thing. But, what was she expecting after pushing her away and never taking her calls?</p><p>“Please, leave…”</p><p>Kara wants to close the door, not because she’s angry, not because she’s not happy to see Lena again. But, because she’s too afraid to let her in again, just to be crushed and abandoned some months later. The blonde is not taking any risk, she will not give Lena another chance to break her heart. She’s ready to close that door for Lena but before she gets the chance to do it. Lena puts her hands on the door, trying to keep open the door for her…</p><p>“Lena! Leave!”</p><p>“NO!”</p><p>“Why not?”</p><p>“Because you need to hear how sorry I am!”</p><p>Kara stops trying to close the door, she looks at her in the eyes and wonders if what she’s hearing is the truth or she’s daydreaming again.</p><p>“You’re sorry?”</p><p>“Yes, I am. I’m very sorry for the way I have been treating you.”</p><p>Kara nods, she knows Lena meant no harm on her behavior, but even then, she did hurt her. She deeply hurt her and Kara’s not willing to take the risk of getting hurt again. And, that’s why she tries to close the door to Lena, once again, but, once again, Lena stops her.</p><p>“No, wait! Actually, it’s not even that, the reason why I’m here… I’m the one who pushed you away and you have every right to not want to see me but you should understand I never meant to hurt you. Pushing away. That’s what I do. I push people away… especially the people I love…”</p><p>‘Love’, the word hits Kara’s core when Lena confesses her love. It’s the first time that the dear CEO has said it out loud and really meant it. It’s scary, it’s a foreign territory for Lena, to expose her feelings, her heart like this, but she has to, she needs to make sure she says it all before...</p><p>“It’s too late. It’s too late to say such words but, I love you, Kara. I love you with all my heart…”</p><p>Kara gulps hard, looking pale and Lena doesn’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing at all, the brunette is to the point of crying, thinking that coming here, to Midvale is a lost cause, but, before she decides to walk away again, her heart compels her to keep going, to keep trying till she lets out everything she has to say.</p><p>“I was scared of hurting you. I'm a Luthor, and, after finding out what my father did to yours, I was sure that you and the baby will be better without me in your lives. I didn’t lie to you when I walked away and said it was for the best…”</p><p>“You hurt me, Lena. Even if you didn’t want it, you hurt me…”</p><p>Lena closes her fists, her hands shaking by the frustration she feels by her actions. She regrets what she did, she regrets she didn’t know better back then but, she’s here now. And, even if it might be too late, she has to try to make it right because after all, we don’t live forever. It’s now or never. There’s nothing else to say than the truth…</p><p>“I know  but I love you Kara, even if I don’t know if I can love properly, nor if I can be loved, actually…”</p><p><em> ‘Oh Lena, if you knew how loved you are, actually…’ </em> Kara thinks, her lips quiver, the vulnerability of Lena, it hits a soft spot in Kara’s heart. Lena is exposing her heart, her insecurities, her soul for the first time in her life, and Kara wishes she could hold her, make her understand why she shouldn’t be afraid to love or be loved but in the end, Kara doesn’t move, she just says...</p><p> “You’re not easy to love…”</p><p>“What?! Does that mean you…?”</p><p>Kara nods, she’s also done with ignoring her heart. She loves Lena, she has been in love with her for long and they chuckle, blush spreading over their cheeks. It feels silly to use the word ‘love’ till now, they don’t make it easy for each other, Lena knows that and that’s why the thing she says is…</p><p>“I know… I know too that I’ll keep messing up again and again. And, you have every right to push me away this time, because I’m too late, a few weeks too late perhaps, but, Kara…”</p><p>Their eyes met and it was like time stopped for Kara, like if there was nothing more than those green eyes, pleading in tears for a chance to love and be loved…</p><p>“I love you! Even if I’m scared, even if I’m a Luthor, even if I’ve pushed you away, I LOVE YOU! So please, please! Give me a chance! I’ll always make it for it, again and again because…”</p><p>“My water just broke...” </p><p>“What?!”</p><p>They look down and their eyes get big of shock when they see the pool of liquids around the blonde.</p><p>“The baby is coming… OMG! The baby is coming!”</p><p>The CEO should be the one comforting the pregnant woman but, it’s Kara who’s trying to calm down the brunette. </p><p>“Breathe, Lena. Breathe…”</p><p>Lena has no idea how Kara looks so calm right now. But, she’s glad to see that at least one of them is keeping it together. Kara calls her family as Lena drives them to the hospital. And, if Alex looked lethal in her outfit of secret agents, she was more than lethal when she got face to face with the last person she was expecting to see that night.</p><p>“What the hell are you doing here?!”</p><p>“Alex, calm down!”</p><p>“No, Sam! She has no rights to be here!”</p><p>“You’re wrong! This is my baby and I’m not going anywhere!”</p><p>Alex angrily groans, she’s more than ready to kick Lena out of the hospital and their lives but when the big contractions start, the only name that Kara is able to say like a broken record is…</p><p>“LENA! LENA!”</p><p>The labor of bringing life to this word starts. And, Kara smiles, feeling complete for the first time in weeks because Lena is at her side, she’s here, she’s not doing this alone because her home is back… her home is here.</p><p>Everything gets in place to welcome their little angel they can’t wait to meet. Looking each other in the eyes, they smile when they understand what it’s to come. Looking back, they have grown together, they have become these strong women who have been able to face their past and heal their open wounds because there’s no better motivation to keep going than love, the big love they have for each other and for the crying baby that a nurse is putting on their arms.</p><p>“OMG! It’s a boy, Kara! It’s a beautiful boy!”</p><p>Holding her son for the first time, seeing this beautiful tiny human being she created, it’s the most wonderful feeling that Lena has ever experienced. And, she cannot imagine a more wonderful path than being here. And, that’s why, some days later...</p><p>NEWS: Lillian Luthor becomes the CEO of L-Corp and Lena Luthors goes MIA</p><p>Lillian reads over and over the header of all the newspapers and magazines of National City and a big smile spreads over her lips.</p><p>“Look at you, you’re able to smile after all…”</p><p>Lillian rolls her eyes and pushes away the newspaper she was reading.</p><p>“You know. Just because you’re the Queen of media, that doesn’t give you free access to my office…”</p><p>Cat Grant laughs at the words of her old friend. She makes herself felt as home and serves two glasses of the expensive liquor she brought with her.</p><p>“Here, I was keeping this for a great occasion…”</p><p>“And, what is this great occasion to make a toast?”</p><p>“That we don’t live forever. But, if we’re lucky, we live enough to see our kids live freely &amp; happy…”</p><p>“I’m not revealing you where she’s…”</p><p>“I know. But, it’s okay. I’ve other news to tell…”</p><p>Lillian smiles, raising her glass, she toast with Cat Grant. </p><p>Spending her last days taking care of a company her husband built and her daughter rebuilt, it was never the path she would imagine for her. She doesn’t like to deal with the board, she doesn’t like to spend all her days in an office. It’s stressful and tedious. She wonders why she doesn’t quit. Why she should be here. </p><p>It’s in that moment when a new message appears on her phone, a message with a picture attached, a picture of a beautiful boy with black hair and green eyes. And, just like that, Lillian remembers why she’s in this office, why this is the path for her, so this child can be free and left alone to live a happy, normal life, with Lena at his side.</p><p>“You chose your path, Lena and, I couldn’t be more proud”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The END? Not yet...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Love, a word used in so many forms, it has never really meant so much to Lena till now…</p><p>‘Love U!’ Yells the little boy who jumps to Lena’s arms the moment she gets past the door. The raven-haired woman wraps him in a warm hug, filling him with kisses as the little AC giggles under such affection.</p><p>Yes, they named their kid AC in honor of Alexander Luthor ‘A’ and Clark Kent ‘C’. The little boy has a big heart like Clark and a great brain like Lex. But, to be honest, he got that too from his two mommies.</p><p>“How was your day at school?”</p><p>The little AC happily says all the adventures he lived today in kindergarten. Lena smiles and wonders if it’s true all his saying or he has a really big imagination when her wife wakes up from her nap and says.</p><p>“He’s not lying, Lee. Today, he painted an entire wall. And, his new teacher, Miss. Teschmacher, didn’t look happy about it…”</p><p>
  <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCBB2020/works/26705914">Fn art _ Parker</a>
</p><p>Lena chuckles, she can imagine the big 1st impression her dear AC gave today to his new teacher. Looking at his face and at Kara’s face she realizes that he painted something more than just the wall of his classroom.</p><p>“Why are you laughing, Lena?”</p><p>The raven-haired woman cannot speak, she can’t stop chuckling, so she just offers a mirror so Kara could look at her face.</p><p>“OMG! AC! What did you do to my face?!”</p><p>The boy giggles, he thinks it funny just like Lena. Son &amp; mother are laughing, and Kara pouts.</p><p>“Oh, you find this funny? Well if you, Lena, think it’s funny to have paint all over the face. Then we should paint your face too!”</p><p>“What?!”</p><p>“Let’s paint the face of your mom, AC!”</p><p>“YEY!”</p><p>“What?! Oh, no! Kara, AC, NO!”</p><p>Lena starts running away when she sees how Kara and AC grab a set of paints. AC and Kara go after Lena, in a pursuit to paint her. They run all around the house, giggling and chuckling about it. And, that’s why when the rest of the family arrives to celebrate the birthday of the little boy, even the Kents were here when they find a very colorful Lena.</p><p>“No pictures, Alex!”</p><p>“Sorry, too late. Lena. This is going directly to the next family calendar…”</p><p>Lena rolls her eyes and decides to take care of the cake as the family settles in her home. When she brings the big cake she made, AC and Kara lick their lips and the dear Luthor chuckles thinking that they are really mother &amp; son.</p><p>Eliza was playing with the boy with Ruby when the doorbell sounded and the last guest arrived.</p><p>“Why do you have paint, all over your face, Lena?”</p><p>“I… I… It’s his fault!”</p><p>Lena points out at her kid and Lillian just raises an eyebrow at her childhood behavior. </p><p>“Grandma!”</p><p>AC runs to the arms of the old woman he doesn’t get to see too much, but, that each time he gets to spend time with her, it’s a happy memory. The entire family is reunited and Kara smiles looking at all the people she has in her life.</p><p>“Okay, everyone is here. Let’s cut the cake!”</p><p>They turn down the light and light up the candles, they sing for more than 10 minutes the song of 'Happy Birthday’ because AC keeps saying ‘again, again’. Nonetheless, the candles can’t stand light up forever and that’s why they do their best to convince AC that the best part of a birthday party is not the song, it’s blowing out the candles.</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Because, you get to make a wish?”</p><p>“A wish?”</p><p>“Yes, a wish. You blow out the candles and make a wish”</p><p>“Will it come true?”</p><p>Lena nods, she has no idea what he will wish for, but she hopes she can make his wish come true. The little boy puts all his efforts to blow out the candles all at once and when he finally gets to do it, everyone applauses. His mothers are serving the cake when Lena remembers she forgot to explain an important thing about blowing out the candles and making a wish: you should never tell what you wish for. But, it’s too late to say something about it because the little AC shouts to the four winds his wish.</p><p>“I’ll get a sister!”</p><p>“What?!”</p><p>The little boy giggles, he’s happy because he blew out his birthday candles and got a wish. And, his wish is getting a sibling to play. He likes to play with Ruby, who’s a girl, so he wants a sister. He wishes for a sister and Lena &amp; Kara just stare at each other, getting more color to their cheeks.</p><p>The couple look at each other, at their perfect cozy home, at the little boy they got and then, looking around the room, they see the pictures of those that are gone. And, realize once again that we don’t live forever. So, why not?</p><p>“Another baby, Lena…?”</p><p>“Yes, let’s have another baby”</p><p>A big smile spreads over their lips already imagining what will be the next step for their family. A new baby, that in reality will become two because they will get twins.</p><p>What if we don’t live forever? It’s a question many people might ask themselves. But, the truth is that the real meaning of living, it’s not to be eternal, but to live brief moments that will last forever in our hearts.</p><p>The birth of their kids, the first Xmas, the first Hallowen together. The first steps, the first words, seeing them leave for college. Even little accomplishments such as teaching their kids how to ride a bike. It’s what makes Kara &amp; Lena feel like they lived forever. And, that’s why each morning they wake up with a big smile, loving each other even more, not worrying at all about when Death will knock their door.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>THE END</strong>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Please check the fn art done for this ch done by the amazing Parker!<br/>https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCBB2020/works/26705914</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>